When was the last time you felt helpless in life? - Lemmy.World
I’m 24 and dealing with high blood pressure. I’ve seen five doctors, had
countless tests, and they all say the same thing: “Take these pills and try to
reduce pressure in your life.” It’s as though my blood pressure and heart rate
have minds of their own, fluctuating freely without any reason. For the past six
months, I’ve felt like I’m on borrowed time. Every morning, I gulp down my
pills, hoping I won’t have a stroke or end up disabled. Once, I dared to think I
was better and skipped my meds for two days. Unfortunately, on day three, my
blood pressure shot up over 150, bringing me crashing back to reality. I’m not
an nihilist, I’m the opposite of that. But facing my own mortality every second
of life has hit me hard. Maybe I’m just like a “24 years old kid” tasting life’s
bitterness for the first time. I hate to compare myself with others, but seeing
friends partying, doing drugs, and sipping coffee just makes me hate this fate
of mine even more. I’m an artist, I studied music and wrote lots of songs (only
keep them for myself, not trying to be a celebrity or anything like that…), and
music has always been my escape. Lately, though, my songs have been pretty dark.
I’m sharing my story not for sympathy, but to connect with anyone else who’s
going through a same journey in their life. If you’ve been there and made it
out, please tell me how you did it. Any advice, hobby, or habit would help! And
if you’re still stuck in the trenches like me, just know you’re not alone. P/S:
This post has been improved by ChatGPT since I’m not confident in my English.
