I makea the pizza

Made chrimbo dimbo at my parents’ this year and I scoffed when Hannah said she was documenting it “for my mastodon”…very sick stuff…but here we are

Check out the Christmas Eve orange French toast that many are calling “leathery”

Made wonky little sausage rolls for a holiday party and enjoyed the very rich leftovers with breakfast! This gave way to a baroque fantasy in which I go on the Great British Bakeoff, incorporate my colorful ethnic traditions into a challenge by making Italian sausage rolls with giardiniera pickle, Paul spits it out and says “it’s not quite right is it,” and everyone on the internet gets mad at one or both of us

Breaking the seal on my homemade pickled jalapenos for a classic “sorrow sandwich”: single piece of white bread, smear of grainy mustard, slice of deli cheese aged to its “use by” date. Lightly microwave and dot with jalapenos to taste. Enjoy standing up

Made a big batch of cold-brine quick pickled jalapeños that weren’t really hitting for me – too bright, too crisp, just too different from the crappy $1.79 jarred pickled jalapeños that I truly crave. So today I strained the brine back out into a saucepan, added a couple scoops of brown sugar, brought it to a boil, and poured it back over the peppers while still hot. That’s more like it: drab green color, limp flesh, fit to crown a pile of shitty movie theater communion wafer nachos

First bagel bake in a couple of months! Not my prettiest batch but at least they also made a huge mess