@neonsnake
i've been writing songs for almost 30 years, and that moment you describe, when a creative thought seems to appear from nowhere, fully formed in your mind? i live for that moment, it is everything to me. i actually dont think i could go on living if i couldnt create
to your point about the magic of creation, even after being a musician for 30 years, i still couldnt explain how i go from playing one chord to a whole chord progression to a melody that fits and so on. it is a huge reason why i focus so much of my energy on creating music, the unknowability means i am always drawn back to try and discover something new about the song, and by extension myself
so i believe the creative act is genuinely a type of magic, probably the only real magic ever to exist in the world. there's something that happens beyond my awareness or understanding that is tangible and real, but also ephemeral and dreamlike. i never get into a flow state as fast as when i start writing songs, i'll look up and realize my throat is sore and my lips are chapped and i havent stopped to take a sip of my now-stale tea for 2 or 3 hours
that's why i am so frustrated and even disgusted by people who choose to sacrifice their creativity for convenience! when i write a catchy hook or melody it's a revelation, heaven opens up and lets me glimpse eternity for a moment. and of course it's gone just as quickly, but for that instant i feel like an angel trumpeting god's arrival on the earth
the creative act is a power beyond my comprehension, a true magic, and that's without even getting into how my music affects other people! there's is nothing as addictive to me as playing a song i wrote and hearing people sing my words back to me. or like the last time i played a gig when i heard someone say "holy shit!" at a particularly provocative line i had written, i think about that moment nearly every day. i used to be an actor and i got a similar feeling when there was a strong audience response to a well-delivered line. and i've been a home cook for decades, and a commercial cook at times, and the feeling is the same for me when a dish comes out tasty and people are humming as they eat it, even if i'm eating alone and doing the humming lmaoo
anyway, this went on much longer than i intended, but i agree with you wholeheartedly. my only personal goal at this point is to keep creating every day