Hilarious portrait my best friend did of me
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Bearwalker
- 128 Followers
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indigeneity, junglism, and design
@Anarkat its funny cause my parents aren't that religious at all, so I wasn't trapped in a 'community' like most Mormons are. But I think that early childhood indoctrination can still be pretty bad... I think a lot about my grade two teacher who was fired for corporal punishment.
@Anarkat to me this stems from the catholic and protestant roots of American culture. The protestant work-ethic being identical to the 'grind' culture we have now. Those attitudes also serving the elite and keeping the poor thinking their poverty is their own doing.
I went to a Catholic school most of my life and see a lot of my decisions reflected by it. Helping others before myself, not valuing wealth, not taking pride in my skills or accomplishments, choosing 'moral' life paths over easier ones. Its actually served to screw me over in the long run and hasn't resulted in a happier life. Actually its been a constance struggle of over work and burnout.
Beyond that my inner voice is all wacked. Constant self judgment, hatred, fear or doing wrong. And this is years after rejecting Christianity and exploring mindfulness, indigenous spirituality, therapy, etc. I can't get it out of my system, probably cause its also the mainstream culture that I encounter everyday.
The true winners of welfare are the slum landlords, who squeeze the total amount of rent from their tenants for the shittiest worst conditions possible. I've been looking at houses to purchase and learned that some pull in thousands by renting out each room for $600+. Like, I saw a 5 bedroom trap house that was getting $3000 a month in rent. The owners had paid off the mortgage years ago so it was mostly profit. Beyond that they were asking $199,000 to sell 🤣 Obviously they also hardly maintain them, this place i saw looked like it needed to be torn down. These landlords own dozens upon dozens of houses in the inner-city, so you could assume they are making upwards of $36,000 a month even after property taxes. Many of these landlords don't actually live in the city, I'm not sure where they live but its probably beautiful. Clearly they're make a killing off of taking advantage of people on EIA. Also, our neighborhoods look fucked up because of it.
I'm actually not bad at managing all of this, but it bothers me because I see so many folks struggling and these barriers are just way too big for entire populations to manage. Like, the indigenous folks here are basically screwed because we don't have the intergenerational wealth of knowledge of these systems to function in them. I luckily learned a lot from my parents, but even then there was massive gaps (like my parents not going to university). But for others there's been generations of families who've never owned a house, don't have bank accounts, never been to university or even graduated high school, haven't submitted taxes regularily, haven't worked a ton of jobs, etc. A lot of this stems back to residential schools for our people, breaking our existing intergenerational knowledge and the Indian act blocking the ability for our families to intergrate. Now we have hundreds of thousands of people completely screwed.
Back in the day you just had your bank, your phone and TV bill, your rent/mortgage, car insurance, taxes and that's it. You didn't need to graduate highschool to get a decent job, housing was cheap as fuck, as were vehicles and energy, and really the only distraction was TV. You couldn't really be doxxed or hacked. You didn't have to check your phone for texts 30,000 times a day.
Beyond that, the bureaucracy you need to navagate to be successful in life is pretty intense now too. Like, navigating the university system (getting a student loan, applying for scholarships, registering for classes, etc.), managing your credit and raising your credit score (learning the tricks of using a credit card properly), applying for jobs in conoetitove narkets, submitting taxes with multiple employers and precarious work, getting pre-approved for mortgages to buy a home, etc. etc. All of this is simply too much for many people, which is why there's tons of people falling through societies cracks.
Life must have been a lot less complicated before the internet. Trying to manage all these fucking services and providers is crazy. Domains, hosts, netflix, music streaming, online shopping, banking, crypto, parking app, library, audio book streaming, etc. I've been going through all my accounts and deleting the ones I don't need and its actually taken weeks. I have email accounts from the past that I can no longer access that are also full of weird accounts. I'll just have to let that data go stale or something... Anyway, its all overwhelming and I sometimes wonder how any of us function.
I need to backup everything before i try this bios reset. What sucks is that I have a bunch of unfinished tunes in ableton and they're hard to back up cause of all the vsts. Everything else is easy-ish. Though I remember fucking around trying to get some drivers to work, and I can't remember what ones...
I really want to setup a Linux distro on a virtual machine but I forgot the password to my bios ages ago and VMs aren't enabled... Apparently HP has a good bios reset tool, but ugh I don't want to go through that whole process. But I should cause I also need access to the bios to enable drive encryption too 😠I got this laptop 7 years ago and its still going strong.