Commander Riker,

I strongly recommend that you stop trying to interact with the Klingon visitors while they are wearing headphones.

Worf

Geordi,

The vampire ships will reach us in less than two days. Have we saved enough daylight to arm all 47 daylight torpedoes?

Worf

Klingon High Council,

I know that my family name is still in disgrace. It is not necessary that you send me annual reminder emails.

Worf

Geordi,

No one has been receiving my emails for many months. This is a significant security risk and it must be fixed.

Worf

Security personnel,

Be advised that humans dressing up as stereotypical Klingons is not appropriate or humorous.

Worf

Breaking character for a moment, because the Mastodon instance my bots are running on is shutting down soon. https://muffinlabs.com/posts/2024/10/29/10-29-rip-botsin-space/

Does anyone have recommendations for well-run instances that bot accounts are welcome to migrate to?

My bots that need a new home include 🧔🏻 @RikerGoogling 👨🏻‍🦲 @picardtips 😠 @WorfEmail 🧊 @LocutusTips 🐠 @EmojiAquarium 🌺 @EmojiMeadow 🐐 @TinyPettingZoo 🧱 @EmojiTetra 🐍 @EmojiSnake

#botsinspace

Engineering,

The current ship-wide malfunctions might be related to an attachment I emailed Lieutenant Commander La Forge recently.

Worf

Commander,

I have a sensitive matter to discuss with you. After the recent incident on the holodeck with the sentient Mario character and his mind control hat, I saw Geordi working in engineering wearing that same hat, a wide mustache, and white gloves.

Worf

UFP Voter Registrar,

I am a Federation citizen who happens to be a Klingon. I have still not received my subspace ballot. Respond.

Worf

Alexander,

I hope you are well. In your Spacebook photo you appear to be inebriated. Have you tried Klingon bloodwine yet?

Father