You don't have to shoulder that burden alone, my friend

I can fuck you when you get tired

They all had engaging soundbites, yes they did!

You know, I've been waiting for something to top spaghetti hentai and I think we found it

Nepotism is so dope, you get to do whoever you want.

Am I right, guys cousins?

Kinda ironic that Amazon.com is killing its namesake through its carbon footprint

Your self-awareness is a good sign. My predecessor was a self-taught cowboy coder with no one to draw comparisons with. He was the lead (read: only) software engineer at my company, barring fresh graduates that didn't know any better.

Then I came along to point out all of his anti-patterns & cruft. By that point, he was too entrenched & self-assured in his abilities to listen to reason. Some people have imposter syndrome, others are imposters that failed upwards in spite of their incompetence.

Sean, if you're reading this - fuck you.

What? I thought airplane mode was so that you can fly the plane and give the pilots a break.

I've been holding my phone perfectly still in coach the entire time. Why didn't anyone tell me?

My head canon says that televangelists like Kenneth Copeland have this quote mounted on their wall.

It's a nice affirmation to return home to, after a long day of grifting their congregation.

Hey, do you think these junkies go back to their crack houses make mixtapes for each other?

Now that's what I call smash & grab music

But think about it. If we were the same, then we could both go fuck ourselves.

It'll be like killing two birds with one penis, y'know?