The Onion's still got it
https://www.theonion.com/police-officers-terrified-by-story-of-tape-that-shows-f-1850534670
Police Officers Terrified By Story Of Tape That Shows Fentanyl Then 7 Days Later You Die
SEATTLE—Shuddering while listening to the horrifying tale, a group of police officers reportedly were terrified Wednesday by the story of a tape that shows fentanyl and then 7 days later you die. “Apparently there’s this old VHS tape going around that shows grainy footage of a pile of fentanyl pills, and if you watch…

