Ok, just to sum it up for those following along at home:
NordVPN: confidence scam, the Raid: Shadow Legends of VPNs
Surfshark: owned by NordVPN
Mozilla VPN: reseller of Mullvad
Tailscale: partners with Mullvad
ExpressVPN: Israeli
Private Internet Access: ditto
ZenMate VPN: ditto
CyberGhost VPN: ditto
Windscribe: edgy branding, transphobic, uses slurs on social media
ProtonVPN: sponsors French fascists
MullvadVPN: donates millions to Swedish fascists

am I missing any?

e: if you are here looking for ones you SHOULD use, these were recommended to me and seem to check out:
https://vpn.ccrypto.org
https://njal.la
or self-host your own:
https://amnezia.org/self-hosted

CCrypto VPN

CCrypto VPN is an affordable, fast, anonymous and secure VPN service

@tael ssh -D
@davidgerard My conclusion at this point is basically that I should spend $4/mo on a VM and run everything through WireGuard
@tael @davidgerard yes, but a lot of services block cloud/hosting infra :(
@tael @davidgerard what about windscribe? (this is not an ad, this is not shilling, this is a genuine question)
@chx @davidgerard I looked at their website and concluded they were not a serious contender
kobot (@[email protected])

Attached: 1 image ยท Content warning: transphobia, r slur

merpstodon!
@toolbear thanks for the information! Windscribe is out. Luckily the original post has been edited with hopefully good alternatives.
@tael @davidgerard
This must be the route for true nerds. Presumably, since you pay for the vm though, it will be possible to find out who you are?
@robpumphrey @tael yeah it's not a variety of residential-looking endpoints

@robpumphrey @davidgerard It wouldn't be impossible, although I believe your bandwidth would be running through the datacenter (and subject to its limits and charges fyi) so it would look like it was coming from your provider. If someone contacted the provider and investigated you I'm sure you'd get turned over; but it would still shield all your requests from your ISP and you could be certain you're not logging anything (though your provider might).

It depends on what you are using a VPN for, really.