Prof. Sam LawlerMay 5
I'm trying to rage-write an article about all the completely awful, useless, polluting, dangerous shit that companies are proposing to launch into orbit and I can't even tell what's fake and what's real on these fucking techbro websites anymore. It's all so fucking ludicrous.
Show threadProf. Sam LawlerMay 5

Like this shit: https://techcrunch.com/2026/04/27/meta-inks-deal-for-solar-power-at-night-beamed-from-space/

Don't worry guys, the CEO says you can stare right into the infrared beam and it's totally safe! I trust him, don't you?

(How you transmit usable amounts of power with a beam that's so diffuse that you can look at it I have no fucking idea.)

Meta inks deal for solar power at night, beamed from space | TechCrunch

Overview Energy's first contract with Meta is a small step toward a future of space-based solar power.

TechCrunch
Show threadProf. Sam LawlerMay 5

Or this shit: https://www.cnn.com/science/space-forge-factory-semiconductors-spc

I guess factories in orbit are already a thing? Tiny factories, for now. Which then have to drop their precious cargo back through the atmosphere somehow and recover it? How does this make any sense economically at all?

This company is sending a factory into space to make materials for semiconductors

UK-based Space Forge wants to create ultra-high-quality crystals in space for the manufacture of semiconductors back on Earth.

CNN
Show threadProf. Sam LawlerMay 5

Or this shit: https://spacedaily.com/sd-n-nasa-backs-interlunes-2028-bid-to-mine-helium-3-from-the-moon/

The Moon's gravity is much weaker than Earth's so it'll be easy to accidentally launch rocks into Moon-escape orbits, making the Earth-Moon trip even more hazardous than it is already. Fun!

NASA Backs Interlune's 2028 Bid to Mine Helium-3 From the Moon

Interlune has secured a $6.9 million NASA award to build what the company says will be the first payload designed to extract solar-wind volatiles, including helium-3, directly from lunar regolith on the moon. The Seattle-based startup announced that the payload, dubbed Prospect Moon, is being developed for a targeted 2028 lunar launch. The award is […]

Space Daily
Show threadProf. Sam LawlerMay 5

Or THIS shit which is really shit: https://harvardtechnologyreview.com/2025/09/05/the-future-of-energy-unlocking-the-potential-of-space-based-solar-power/

Many companies are looking at different ways to do this (like the stare-into-the-IR-beam company above). All of them have huge safety, tech, and/or feasibility issues.

The Future of Energy: Unlocking the Potential of Space-Based Solar Power - Harvard Technology Review

A Future with Unrestricted Solar Panels  What if we lived in a world where solar panels produced electricity year-round, unaffected by night or clouds? Once considered a book-only sci-fi fantasy, space-based solar power, or SBSP, is now gaining popularity as […]

Harvard Technology Review
Show threadProf. Sam LawlerMay 5

But of course nothing beats SpaceX's drunk teenager scifi novel of an FCC filing about how we need AI data centres in orbit to ascend into Kardashev civilization land. Which the FCC took totally seriously, opened for public comment in 4 days (record-short time!) https://docs.fcc.gov/public/attachments/DA-26-113A1.pdf

and the FCC will probably approve despite a couple thousand comments from the public and at least two petitions to deny opposing it. Fuckers.

Show threadProf. Sam LawlerMay 5

RE: https://mastodon.social/@sundogplanets/115345346648445621

A million satellites have obvious consequences, but even one can cause huge amounts of damage. Reflect Orbital, possibly simultaneously the most useless and damaging company ever to exist, which I have ranted about many times, and will continue to rant as their FCC filing is also likely to be approved despite a couple thousand comments against it from the general public and at least 2 formal petitions to deny. I really really hate this company a lot.

Show threadProf. Sam LawlerMay 5
I want to see companies that promise to use a handful of well-tested, ethically built, perfectly functioning satellites with decades-long operating lifetimes to do something that benefits the vast majority of humanity. Why can't we have more proposals like that?
Show threadProf. Sam LawlerMay 5

Oh. This is orbital enshittification.

Shit.

Show threadProf. Sam Lawler6d ago
Another day, another extremely poorly though-out satellite megaconstellation that will enshittify orbit! https://spacenews.com/star-catcher-raises-65-million-for-space-power-grid/
Star Catcher raises $65 million for space power grid

Star Catcher Industries, a company developing power-beaming technology for satellites, has raised $65 million to validate the technology in space.

SpaceNews
Show threadProf. Sam Lawler6d ago
BATTERIES. Batteries. Why are the techbros so excited about putting shiny shit in orbit instead of making better batteries on Earth? Not dystopian-scifi-enough?
Show threadLoy Hena

@sundogplanets

because they want to be *seen*, they want everyone to look at them

May 12 at 4:56pmWeb