Valerie RoneyI had people step back and hold a door open for me three different times today. THREE!
In case anybody needed their faith in humanity redeemed.
The kindness and caring is out there, it's just not the stuff that makes the news.
Lynn McAlister UE 
@vlrny One of my strongest memories from young adulthood was going into a building and having a little kid hold the door for me. I thought, decency isn't dead - it's four years old
@lmgenealogy this makes my heart go pitter patter.
*breaks into song*
🎶I believe the children are out future... 🎶🥲
*breaks into song*
🎶I believe the children are out future... 🎶🥲
ZenHeathen 🇨🇦@vlrny I grew up learning to hold the door for people. I got to university, and I got shouted at for it, told it was sexist. That hurt, I was just being nice to people. So I decided, rather than ceasing to hold the door for people, I'd just make sure to hold the door for *all* people. It's not about them needing the help, it's not about me thinking they need the help. It's about me doing a tiny little favour for my fellow human being, whomever they might be. No one's ever had a problem with it since.
@ZenHeathen brilliant pivot! Kindness is gender neutral! 🧠✨
@vlrny Nothing's better than holding the door for someone who you can tell from their reaction has never had a door held for them before. :)
@ZenHeathen @vlrny Yeah, that's what I noticed when I lived in Scotland in the 90s - everyone held doors for everyone. (May not be true anymore, but it was then.) That's kind of coloured my view of it. It's just basic civility in a society where civility has been nearly eradicated.
@lmgenealogy Civility, good word for it. It reminds me of something else where my approach recently shifted.
When driving, it often comes that one needs to signal to another driver or to a pedestrian that they should go ahead, especially in parking lots and at four-way stops. I realized that this often irritated me, because people always seemed to be hurried and pushy with that communication, hand signals that more said, "go on, git!", or "hurry up and go!" So I adjusted my own hand signalling to make sure I'm not giving anyone else that impression. I thought about it, and now I use "palm up" gestures. Rather than "shooing" you along, I intend to "invite you", to "welcome" you. My favourite is where someone doesn't expect you'll stop and wait for them, even though the rules say you must, and I stop, take both hands from the wheel, and gesture what I hope is a calm, two-handed, "please, go ahead" with a smile. I don't know if I can influence other drivers to do this, but I think others have responded well to me. @vlrny
@ZenHeathen @vlrny The funny thing is, even little attempts to be civil can make a difference. I mean, we can't necessarily change the world, but maybe we can make our little corner of it less stressful for the people around us.
@lmgenealogy @ZenHeathen civility is an excellent word. And yes, it may not change the world but it adds some softness to our interactions which can definitely smooth out some of our grindy social edges these days.