Well this has to rank among some of the weirder items of mail I've ever received. They arrived in a brown manila envelope decorated with stickers. Addressed to my business but not to me by name. No return address. Postmark is Cleveland, Ohio. Inside, no letter or explanation, just three snippets of handwritten music in both blue and red ink titled "LORD JEFFREY M. HARRIS CHRISTMASS (sic) MASS CONCERTO", "LORD JEFFREY M. HARRIS CONCERTO RIGHT", and "QUEEN KAREN JAZZ WORLD JAZZ" in all caps.

It must be said that these titles make no sense, either musically or linguistically. At first I thought maybe a child had written them and for some reason decided to mail them to me. Maybe an old student?? But the more I look at them the handwriting, though sloppy, does not look like the handwriting of a child. Moreover, I have no idea what this person expects me to do with these. They're little more than undeveloped motifs (NOT two concertos and a "jazz world jazz" whatever that is). And I haven't one clue who Lord Jeffrey M. Harris is, or why he would require even a single concerto let alone two. I'm not even sure if these are meant to be played by piano, since the music only contains a single clef. So many mysteries!

If this is you and you recognize your handiwork, please pipe up in the comments and explain yourself! I have no idea what was intended by this little gift.