Chu 朱13h ago

So much I love about this story.

Dudes crying about their rights to harass women....

https://www.cbc.ca/radio/asithappens/sexual-harassment-billboard-9.7152106

When an airport rejected this sexual harassment lawyer's small ad, she sued. Now she has a giant billboard | CBC Radio

A New York airport authority rejected sexual harassment lawyer Megan Thomas's ad copy and asked her to tone it down, so she filed a free speech lawsuit. The judge took her side, and now she has two massive ads on full display.

CBC
Show threadMichael Weiss9h ago

@chu There's something I find fascinating in reading the comments. I had to go back and reread the article to make sure I didn't miss a signal.

In no way did the advertisement imply that they're representing women who were harassed by men. Nor did the CBC article.

Yet a significant percentage of the comments assumed it.

I know that it is more common for women to be the victims here than men. And women should absolutely be treated with respect in the workplace that is generally afforded to men. I've seen plenty.

But men are still often the victims of harassment, either by women or by other men. And those who are deserve acknowledgement and support, too.

Reread the article like I did. The only genders mentioned in it are the owner of the business who was putting up the ad, and the judge who issued the ruling. And even then they were mentioned only in the sense of casual pronoun use.

Chu, I am not pointing at you here. You responded appropriately to @JoeHenzi and so I don't want to discount that.

Show threadflere-imsaho πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡¦8h ago

@mweiss @chu @JoeHenzi in general female-presenting people are way more frequently harassed, and that's just statistics.

it does not mean that there's no harassment going the other way or that there is no same-gender harassment going on, of course, but these cases will be more rare.

Show threadMichael Weiss8h ago

@mawhrin @chu @JoeHenzi The rarity is part of the point. We're not talking about black swan events, just less frequent events. The flattening creates knee-jerk reactions. It builds stereotypes. It results in marginalization of people like Joe.

And all of that is both unnecessary and unnecessarily harmful. It's not a zero-sum game, where acknowledging that every human is a potential victim means that we cannot protect women, or that we should care less about doing so.

Show threadJoeHenzi
@mweiss @mawhrin @chu It happens, people need to protect their stereotypes. I've been subjected to this twice. As a minor I worked for the local newspaper's satellite office. There was a woman there who prayed on minors, plying them with alcohol. She took us out for a "Christmas Party" where multiple people got sick, ushered me into her bed and undressed me before taking things further... To this day I'm still blamed for being the aggressor by my (former) friends despite them seeing me being pulled into her room while trying to leave. She even used the incident to try and put distance between me and others who were interested in me romantically. They didn't fire her, though a woman did resign in disgust (only one of the people involved in HR was a man, the bosses were women and the HR reps were women). She then slept with two more minors before being let go. They somehow let the second report slide because he admitted to being willing - though she was the manager and he was 17 years old and illegally drunk. It took 3 reports of sex with children. Anyone else would label her a pedophile like Epstein though she did it with an apartment and drugs/alcohol and not an island and a helpful mistress. In the end, it hurt people all the same. In every case those teens lost the person they were dating when she targeted them.
7:29pmWeb
Show threadChu 朱6h ago

@JoeHenzi @mweiss @mawhrin

Sorry you went through this.

Though the vast majority of the time, the gender roles are reversed, it does happen. It's horrible no matter who it happens to.

And though I applaud this law team for seeking justice, I am skeptical of justice being applied in the bulk of cases.

Show threadJoeHenzi6h ago

@chu @mweiss @mawhrin Hey, you don't have to pretend. Everyone knows what happens, being told over and over that statistics are different is a weird and wild thing. I can't imagine you'd bring up crime statistics to any other victim of any other crime - especially after being told about people having sex with what are children. I'm sure it would be comforting to an arson victim that typically the arsonist is a firefighter.

I'm skeptical of justice too, but for different reasons, one has been playing out since I was 17 and here it is again. What a mistake to share this.

Show threadJoeHenzi6h ago
@chu @mweiss @mawhrin No where did I dispute statistics or bring up anything to make me be told this twice now. I said I support the placement of the ad in airports - work trips are the place these things happen. I know, it was being followed on a trip that made feel cornered and feeling like my only escape was to attempt my own life (there in the airport). Was told to, that there is no escaping the attention I didn't want. I had been through this before, it ruined my relationships. And it did again, I lost everything because of this person who pursued me.
Show threadChu 朱6h ago

@JoeHenzi @mweiss @mawhrin

Sorry Joe if that sounded dismissive.

I am genuinely sorry that anyone has to go through experiences like that.

My own experience with assault nearly ruined my marriage.

My trauma turned into putting my daughter into martial arts at a young age. I hope I don't pass too much trauma onto her and why I am obsessed with her ability to kick where it matters.

I am sure for men, that's not even an option because then you get charged for assault on top of it all too.

I have no answers. But I am genuine that I feel angry this happened to you. Nobody should go through this.

Show threadJoeHenzi5h ago
@chu @mweiss @mawhrin I've deleted multiple replies - people largely are dismissive and it's what got me arrested and them not. I remember sitting in the police station crying that I was there and they were not - it felt wild.
Show threadMichael Weiss5h ago

@JoeHenzi @chu @mawhrin it's hard to share like that. And brave. You may feel that it was a mistake, but it's so very important for stories like yours to be told.

Silence encourages people to believe that these things don't happen. Or that they happen less often than they really do. It's the same thing that happened with women for so long, and it's gotten much better in the past couple of decades. Not good enough, or there wouldn't have been a point in the ad that led to the article. But definitely better.