Someone needs to make a fake nuclear football for Donnie

The "nuclear football" (Presidential Emergency Satchel) is a 45-pound, secure black briefcase carried by a rotating military aide, ensuring the U.S. President can authorize a nuclear strike anywhere, anytime. It holds communication tools, classified war plan scenarios (the "Black Book"), and bunker locations. The President authorizes orders using codes on a card known as the "biscuit".