when my wife was pregnant with $KID1 she climbed a step stool, dropped a glass jar of honey, and then called for me. i heard none of this and have been traumatized by that realization for the last eight years

today i finally thought it’d be okay to “lock in” so i could work through a month’s worth of class work in eight hours. put on my headphones, locked the office door, and got to work… and less than an hour in she dropped a glass jar, asked $KIDS to get me, and I heard none of this

maybe by 2034 i’ll be able to use noise-canceling headphones when other people are in the house without anyone breaking glass