2
Weir: i will use this story to convey the following scientific facts to you
Weir: (1) the atmospheric co-efficient of Mars
Weir: (2) the tangent cosign of the hypotenuse of space
Weir: (3) the importance of STEM
Weir: (4) the langitudinal curve of space-time squared
Weir: beep boop

3
Jule Verne: but andy, don't you see? stories can be about more than cold facts!
Weir: beep boop
Weir: prognosis negative
Weir: further input required
Weir: explain data
Verne: theme and motif can communicate the ineffable experience of being human
Weir: ERROR ERROR THAT SOUNDS LIKE POLITICS ERROR

4
Verne: through the medium of story, we can truly achieve human connection and plumb the true depth of humanity!
Verne: now a lot of people think that 20,000 leagues under the sea is just a story about a cool submarine
Verne: but it's actually much, much more
Weir: does not compute

5
Verne: it's about what it means to be part of the brotherhood of man
Verne: it's about life and loss and love!
Weir: what is this love you speak of
Verne: oh andy
Verne: how can i describe love
Weir: why are your ocular orbs leaking Weir: are your circuits in need of repair

6
Verne: do you understand what i'm saying? story is about meaning
Weir: i liked the part where they fought the squid
Verne: oh yeah everyone likes that part
HG Wells: it was pretty cool
Wells: andy's on to something there

7
Verne: how can i communicate the ineffable magic of story?
Verne: if only there was someone whose whole bit was pontificating about the nature of story
Verne: that would be a very useful person to have around in this situation

8
Robert Heinlein: forget these losers, andy, i've got a story that you'll really enjoy!
Heinlein: it's about marines in space! and they have guns!
Heinlein: [finger guns] pew pew pew pew!
Heinlein: pew pew pew! pew pew!
Verne: ok rob you've made your point
Heinlein: I'M NOT DONE YET

9
Weir: beep boop i-i
Weir: what is this strange sensation
Weir: i feel
Weir: i feel an emotion
Weir: i feel like space marines shooting guns is totally badass
Heinlein: eh? eh? see?
Heinlein: you're welcome

10
Weir: beep boop i have always enjoyed escapist science fiction that is devoid of deeper meaning
Weir: like the classic star trek
Weir: harlan ellison is so good at that beep boop
HG Wells: oh no
Harlan Ellison: I WILL MURDER YOU AND EVERYONE HERE

@NuclearOatmeal "Marines in space going pew pew pew" is however not representative of Heinlein's body of work: see for example "The Unpleasant Profession of Jonathan Hoag", or "He Built a Crooked House", etc.

@cstross The Unpleasant Profession of Jonathan Hoag is such a good story. Plus all of Heinlein's early weird stuff like for us the living