Got an elderly family member off of online bank Ally Bank, a quite disorganized outfit. I know a former bank robber with better ethics than these clowns.
Got the person to open an account with a local bank with this argument:
Never use a bank where you can't walk in with a gun to get your money.
[Surveillance state notice (tm): Don't freak out, dudes. People in "open carry" states do this every day.]