@Bronwyn one way of framing it that I found helpful was that insuring and not-insuring are both gambling, just with different odds/payoffs. House edge and bad odds but small bets vs. no edge but you're betting your entire car/house/whatever. Made it easier for me to stomach earthquake insurance even though it's a loss in expectation, since I can handle the insurance payments a lot more easily than I could handle losing my house.

If you get a deductible that's the highest loss you're confident you'd be able to handle, that should get a lower premium and will mean that you're only paying to insure risks you're not comfortable taking yourself.