Bonus: if you *act now*, I'll tell you about the best bloopers that happened during the pre-recording.

(This is vacuously true, I'll tell you anyway. But seriously, take your seat, you've got less than thirty seconds!)

That time I tried to say "off-the-shelf chartplotter" and it turned into "shartplotter" which then ruined the next six takes because I could talk without dying laughing. At least one attempt had me referring to the "off-the-chart shelfplotter," which is far more boring, but still ruined the take.

Or that time the mic fell too far down my cleavage and started rustling all the way through the recording.

Or how I lost my balance during the talk because we recorded it on the boat!