NickMar 17, 2025

St Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland, the evidence for this being that there are no snakes in Ireland that are not owned by zoos or goths.

In the same way, St Patrick must have driven the moles out of Ireland, because there are no moles. Maybe he was a golfer and they ruined the greens.

Anyway, hardware chain B&Q apparently did not know this and stocked sonic mole repellers in Northern Irish stores for years, where they never sold.

#StPatricksDay

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/northern_ireland/7335006.stm

BBC NEWS | UK | Northern Ireland | Blindingly obvious... mole repellers useless

DIY retailer B&Q is recalling sonic mole repellers from its Northern Ireland stores - because the mammals do not exist in Ireland.

Show threadEnrico4d ago
@Nickiquote reminds me of St. Paul and Malta: he was bitten by a snake and miraculously didn’t get poisoned. There are no venomous snakes in Malta. So either he miraculously removed the venom from all snakes in the island or he didn’t get poisoned because the snakes had no venom 🤣
Show threadDan Hatton

@illogical_me @Nickiquote

Candidate for a Humphries miracle: it doesn't operate by suspending the operation of the natural regularities that would later become known to humans via the scientific method, it operates by taking advantage of God's privileged (before humans had devised the scientific method) knowledge of those regularities.

Mar 17 at 1:57pmWeb