it's #LongCovidAwarenessDay and i don’t think i have posted the whole of what this thing has done to me in one place, so here it is.

Yesterday my dad asked if i had “gotten over” long covid yet. uh, no, i’m afraid not. it doesn’t work that way.

i got covid in january of 2022. we had been very careful but we are at risk because of my partner’s retail job. he masks at work and we rely so hard on that mask. it is really scary to worry about getting it again. retail workers should get hazard pay.

it messed up my lung capacity and i lost my ability to sing. it is still not 100% but is better than it was. i used to enjoy singing into my synths but i had to stop and learn to make sounds other ways. i was in choir for years, singing was something i really enjoyed. but also, even just singing in the car, singing a stupid little song to the cat, were too hard. i was out of breath. it felt like a big part of me was taken away.

it messed up my emotional regulation and ability to control my temper for about a year and a half. it was very, very scary. like i was one of the Flying Wallendas walking across a tightrope and a guide wire snapped. Swinging from 0-100 at the drop of a hat. Ruining my relationships.

i’m often in a fog and struggle to deal with everyday stuff. a lot of things that were on my to-do list in early 2022 are still waiting on the list.

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