A reflection. I’ve heard actors and singers say that stage fright never really disappears before a performance. And I wonder whether there is an equivalent feeling for a painter. One idea I propose is the sensation I feel when I’m almost finished with a form—whether it’s the background or a part of the whole, for example a piece of fruit. Then I think: “What if I make a mistake? Will it be so noticeable that the focus of attention will become that error?” Sometimes it has happened. And it may be that one of the reasons I paint so much is to have paintings without mistakes that represent me. A few of them come to mind.
I know this fear pretty well.
Sometimes I am also scared of the blank paper in front of me. Cos I don’t know how to start. I don’t want to destroy anything.
Last week I tried to paint on a t-shirt with bleach. To know that it wasn’t erasable made me a little nervous.
Sometimes when you make a little break when you’re almost done with an artwork, you left the flow and it is difficult to ‘restart’ again.
But I think that our mistakes represent us and our art too.
Imperfection is important.
