Friend A, explaining the concept of certain types of customers at bars: Basic-bitch drinks, like vodka-lime sodas.
Friend B: I like those!
Friend A: Okay, Midori Lemonades?
Friend B: That's even more targeted at me!
Friend A: Okay fair... Y'know, the types of drinks ordered by young college girls looking to get crunk?
Friend B: Do I look like I know any bitches?
Me: Hey now, I'm a bitch (positive), aren't I?
Friend B: You're more of a hag.