Mastodawn

I'm not a car person, so I never really paid attention to car makes or models before. Sure, I knew that there were Hondas and Hyundais, but unless someone was actively pointing them out, I couldn't tell you which was which.

Then I became the owner of a little red Ford Focus, and I started driving it around.

Next thing I knew, I was spotting them *everywhere*. I'd come out of the grocer and there'd be identical ones parked on both sides of me! Hell, I eventually got a window decal so I could more easily tell which was mine 😋

A couple years ago I discovered I was lactose intolerant, and—bear with me, these stories are connected—I started keeping lactaid with me wherever I went (just to be safe). I started paying attention to just how much dairy was in things, and wow, spoiler: it's in like *everything* 😅

Over the past couple years, I've gotten pretty used to being lactose intolerant. I keep lactase handy, and I watch out for things with "too much dairy". It's just become background noise—like noticing other Ford Focuses (Foci?). It's just part of my life now.

A couple months ago I got propositioned by a creep in my hotel's lobby.

A couple weeks ago I had slurs yelled at me as I walked down the street with my mom.

A couple days ago someone told me to kill myself in a DM.

Every day, someone says "really? I don't see stuff like that here".

I don't see a lot of the bad stuff, not because I skip over it, but because I have blocked with abandon.

I'm not saying this to tell others to block like me (I did it to excess actually), but to explain to those who do not see the bad posts that there might be a reason they don't see them. Not everyone here has the same experience. Also, different instances might block whole other instances.

So, when someone says they are being harassed, believe them the first time they say it.

There are a lot of people who don't see it in the physical world either. Women often don't talk about these things in public. I'm not victim blaming. There's lots of reasons for that, not least of which is a credible fear of retaliation. Probably other reasons that I'm not aware of, too.

Men, of course, rarely see gendered abuse and so can ignore or deny it if they choose. Even abusers, incredibly, do this.

Show thread

Nicole Parsons Feb 27

@bruce @bjb @alice

Efforts to discuss examples of bigotry or harassment will often get you redirected to HR or suggestions for therapy, that's how bad the deliberate blindness of privilege works

The physical health problems that arise from social ecosystems of unacknowledged white supremacy.

People with high blood sugars & pre-diabetes despite good dietary & exercise habits.

Young POC with heart attacks.

Cortisol overload from the stress of being in an environment of unwarranted hate

Show thread

lee Feb 27

@Npars01 @bruce @[email protected] @alice and on an ableism front, people rarely notice the way they use "blindness" to mean ignorance 😋

Show thread

Hugs4friends ♾🇺🇦 🇵🇸😷

@inherentlee True. Casual ableism is using blind and deaf in the wrong context. Worse still, is the failure to acknowledge how much more ableism is in common phrases and words used unthinkingly. How few Women's Associations include BIPOC in their groups, or Disabled.☹😳 @Npars01 @bruce @alice