Tim Bray

Hey, Denmark is a monarchy. Get His Maj Frederik, who’s a good-looking dude, to offer the orange one a Royal Duchy that comes with a cool golden crown or something like that if he’ll shut up about Greenland. Orange guy loves royalty.

https://www.kongehuset.dk/en/the-royal-family/hm-the-king

Jan 19 at 8:50pmWeb
Show threadThird spruce tree on the leftJan 19

@timbray

Bonus points if they make him the Grand Duke of <Danish for "Land full of Turds" or "Lots of Hot Air Here" or similar>

Show threadSam BriesemeisterJan 19
@timbray
Perhaps he can even enjoy a certain domain of governance for his Duchy…
Show threadKevin LawverJan 19
@timbray The Danmark Pizza Prize Plate. It comes with a slicer and napkins. Goes great with Diet Coke.
Show threadmartijnJan 19
@timbray That might work if it were trump's own idea, but it was probably the apartheidtler (musk for people with filters) wanting the minerals who got him fixated on it
Show threadMark EichinJan 19
@timbray sure, because the emoluments clause has been out the window for ages?
Show threadCurioso 🍉 🇺🇦 (jgg)Jan 19

@timbray

Tell Trump the Canadians have something the US doesn't have: a foreign king.

He only have to sign the US into the Danish monarchy to make Greenland and the US a unified kingdom.

Then, appoint him Archiduke of Mar-a-Lago.

Problem solved.

Show threadrob pikeJan 20
@timbray Appeasement doesn't have a great track record.
Show threadPeter LudemannJan 20
@robpike @timbray Giving Greenland would be appeasement; giving a gold bauble is like saying "squirrel" to a dog.
Show threadJonathan HendryJan 20

@PeterLudemann @robpike @timbray

No because Trump will just come back demanding Greenland again.

Don't be surprised if he makes surprise demands of FIFA as the World Cup approaches.

Show threadPeter LudemannJan 20

@jonhendry

And if Greenland is taken over by the US without strong response, that would indeed be appeasement. Shiny distractions are a response, although they likely would only buy a bit of time (the EU "bazooka" would take about 6 months to go through the legally required process before the "bazooka" starts to take effect and at least as long again before pocketbook effects start to be felt in the US).

@robpike @timbray

Show threadTim BrayJan 20
@robpike Was thinking of it more as bribery, but fair point.
Show threadScott marsroverdriver MaxwellJan 20
@timbray @robpike Not to mention the emoluments clause, not that anybody gives much of a damn about the Constitution at this point.