RE: https://chaos.social/@dentangle/113561039557941252

It's our Alonsoversary !

For a year now, this little dog has been turning our life upside down in the best of ways with his regular visits, and, so you've told us, putting smiles on the faces of folks on the Fediverse from around the World.

It has been a helluva year, but Alonso has made it bearable. Alonso doesn't read the news, but he can tell when we have.

Alonso reminds us that no matter how small or unimportant you think you are, you can make a meaningful difference.

We've always wanted a dog, but circumstances made it difficult. Apparently a year ago we wished REALLY HARD, and Alonso turned up. 🐶
Day one of the new year here in the Alonsoverse started with the traditional Friday night sleepover. I made Rad Na for dinner and Alonso had a bit of the gravy with his croquettes. He likes to eat what we eat.

Alonso was unable to come today, we assume, thanks to the chasseurs being out in full force with dogs and guns.

It really shouldn't be necessary to keep your pets and children indoors and wear hi-vis on your own property to avoid getting shot. 😠

Glad they kept him inside and safe though. Their 6 yo daughter too, presumably...

No chasseurs today, so we might get a visit from Alonso later.

I hope so. I scrawled a database schema on a piece of paper the other day and Alonso approved it by adding his paw mark to the page. 🐾

I'm reluctant to update it without getting Alonso's sign-off.

08:13 sunrise 🌅
08:20 Alonso 🐶
Alonso is on the blanket
Alonso is under the blanket
Alonso is in the blanket
Alonso is the blanket
👩 I think Alonso might be hungry.
🧔 Is he awake?
👩 Yes.
🧔 He's hungry.

It was raining lightly but we managed a walk to the lac with Alonso. 🐕 🧑‍🤝‍🧑

It was the kind of weather where we were quite surprised not to find a body along the route.

Perhaps we've watched too many scandi murder series, but this was an "episode one" kind of day. You know, the one you probably shouldn't watch while eating dinner where the passerby finds something gruesome in the forest.

Alonso is still here. 🐶

It's been two days (and two nights). Hope his owners are okay. Will check in with them a bit later.

He's been here two nights in a row before, but generally he's been collected, taken home, escaped, and returned.

Of course, *we* don't mind how long he stays, but this is somewhat unusual.

Alonso was just collected by his owner, who also brought us another 10kg of dog food for the boy. Alonso thought this signalled a bonus mealtime and had to be extracted from the kitchen to go home.

His owners are okay, just both working late, and apparently each thought the other was going to collect Alonso 😅

We understand. Many parents have a school run to do. Fewer also need to make time for an Alonso run too 🐶

Update: Alonso's head wound is healing nicely. He tries to scratch it every now and then, now that the dreaded cone has been removed. However, it's clear the thing he missed most while wearing the cone was being able to lick his balls. He spent most of his first day of freedom making up for lost time. 😉
A rather moist Alonso has arrived, and says that yes, pancakes on a Saturday morning would be lovely. 🥞
Alonso picked out and ate the larger beef rings and ignored the "old manny porridge" (the stuff his owners gave us to feed him), then turned to us to ask where his pancakes were 🥞
Poor Alonso is not happy that the chasseurs are nearby. He's been barking at the window and whining. He KNOWS.

Alonso just fell off the desk.

#Gravity

Alonso has been collected by his owners after another sleepover. I think this determined little dog has spent more nights here than at home this week.

He's here so often now they're going to give us the medicine he's supposed to have for his rheumatism so he doesn't miss any doses. ⚕️

👩🐶🧔

Alonso, boulot, dodo.

Alonso stayed here last night, which meant we could get an early start on testing Linux kernel release candidates 6.17.12-rc1, 6.12.62-rc1 and 6.18.1-rc1

Alonso says those look ok and can we have second breakfast now?

Alonso has just arrived, which means Friday night can begin.

Last night Alonso watched through the whole process while we prepared dinner, sniffing each of the ingredients that I held out for him, and supervising the cooking. He was then was whisked away by his owner before he got to try any.

He is once again in the kitchen, supervising the dinner hopefully. Will he get to stay?

Alonso's Friday night sleepover plans were foiled as his owner finished work in time to collect him.

He did, however, manage to share a little bit of our dinner first 🥩 🐶

No sign of the boy today. It was a beautiful day so we went to the lac without him.

The top of a fallen tree has been blocking the path next to the lac for weeks, which meant precariously squeezing past it and trying not to fall in. Today I decided to do something about it, and spent about 20 minutes sawing all the small branches with the tiny bush saw on my pen knife and cleared the path. Next time I'll take something a bit bigger!

At least now we won't have to worry about Alonso falling in!

Pizza night tonight. We'd just sat down to eat when a familiar WUFF came at the door. 🐶

It's dark and after 9pm. We've texted his owners and told them he can stay 🤣

The pile of blankets on my desk is snoring. 🐶💤

Alonso is one smart dog.

We took him out into the woods yesterday to collect some firewood with the tracteur. 🚜 🪵 🐕

Today, we were out in the woods again and so not at the house when he came to visit.

Alonso followed his nose out into the woods and found us, to tell us it was time to come back in for lunch and to work on some code.

He's such a good boy. 🐶

Alonso really didn't want to go home last night.

He'd waited patiently for dinner, which was almost ready when a knock at the door signalled the arrival of his owner.

I took him outside (and closed the door behind me). After a quick run around outside, Alonso returned and tried to get back inside, then implored me to let him in. His poor owner was calling to him, but he kept looking up at me *pleading* to be allowed to stay.

😢

Alonso was back before breakfast this morning.

Alonso is back with his owners tonight again after a two day visit. Mostly coding, a little light forestry and many many naps.

Alonso was very cold out in the woods this afternoon so we put him on my jacket in the tracteur while we finished up. He liked that. Warm, and able to keep an eye on us. Then he had a ride back to the house sitting on my lap 🚜

A whine at the door during breakfast heralded the arrival of a somewhat moist Alonso. He has been towelled-off, fed, wrapped in a blanket and is now fast asleep. 🐶 💤

Think I'll grab another cup of tea and work on some code.

Alonso's Friday night plans have been curtailed. He wandered off while we were chopping wood and his owner picked him up down the road.

He makes choices. They're not always good choices, but they are his.

We hadn't seen Alonso since Friday. The chasseurs have been out all weekend, festively shooting festive things in a festive way, so his owners have probably been keeping him in.

Alonso arrived well after dark this evening, having staged a late escape. I suppose we should let his owners know he's here, although I think they can probably guess. 😉

That was quite a yelp, indicating the arrival of a very wet and cold Alonso, who then proceeded to resist all attempts to dry him properly.

It's chucking it down out there. We're not had any of the forecast snow but I wouldn't describe it as warm outside.

(A THUMP in the other room while typing this suggests Alonso has just had one of his gravity moments)

Alonso's owner came to collect him last night and said he probably won't be here much because they will be home for the holidays.

Apparently Alonso didn't get the memo.

WUFF! 🐶

We went out to the woods earlier on a secret quest (ssh! - more on that later). Alonso, paying no attention at all, went off in the other direction towards the lac.

When Alonso is focused on his nose he is almost completely deaf, or so it seems.

He was searching for us in the woods, and only about 20 metres away when I called loudly to him and he couldn't apparently hear me. Eventually he spotted us and ran up to greet us.

Alonso lives with a small human. She's 6 and just started school this year. Her father takes her out into the woods on our property, teaching her about the outdoors and things like how to find mushrooms. They've built a little place near the stream.

Since we spotted their secret place in the summer ideas keep popping into my head. The former Scout leader part of my brain wants to set a treasure hunt.

Bearing in mind Miss 6's age we decided that some of my more elaborate ideas, such as "Crime Scene Santa: the Hunt for a Killer" will have to wait until she's a bit older.

In the end we went with a simple note:

Bonjour [redacted] !

Un de tes cadeaux est tombé du traîneau !

Je suis vraiment desole, mais je ne peux pas m'arrêter pour le chercher car je dois rendre visite à beaucoup d'enfants pour Noël.

Le cadeau a atterri dans le bois près de chez toi.

Je pense que tu pourras le retrouver dans les bois si tu regardes attentivement. Je crois qu'il est tombé près du ruisseau.

Joyeux Noël !

père Noël

Yes! Miss 6 found her presents in the woods today! 😃 🎅

We just received a lovely message from Alonso's owners along with some pictures of their daughter finding and then using her presents. It was just little stuff - some colouring pens, a book to draw in and some stickers, but the smile on her face was totally worth it.

Right, next year she's going to have to work for it. There will be a map 🗺️ 😉

Alonso came for a visit on Boxing Day, and his owners brought us a lovely hamper when they collected him to say thanks. ❤️

Alonso also came for a visit yesterday and had another sleepover here.

This is the dog that won't be here much because it's the holidays 😉

Alonso arrived (just in time for breakfast, having, presumably, just had breakfast).

He's now helping me prepare my company accounts while sleeping under a pile of blankets on my desk.

Alonso is, I assure you, more capable and attentive than our previous accountant, less likely to give bad VAT advice, and his fees are very reasonable.

💸 🐶

I might need to phone HMRC to check whether Alonso's sausages are tax deductable. He claims they are fully and necessarily incurred for the business, but I think he'd have eaten them anyway.

We walked Alonso to the lac yesterday and again today, as he'd stayed the night here.

We met his owners on the way back. Each of them in two cars heading in opposite directions converged on our position, along with their daughter. It is quite common in rural France to just park in the middle of the road and have a long chat. No one minds. If anyone had wanted to get past they'd have waited while we finished.

Alonso went home with them, but his owners say he'll likely be back later 😉

Sometimes when I'm cooking I let Alonso smell the various ingredients. A little bit of vegetable, a spice packet, a bottle etc. He he has a careful little sniff, and loses interest when he smells it's not something he eats.

I was not expecting him to eat the kim chi.

Alonso claimed his first sleepover of the year. 🐶 💤

I've been saving some Alonso stories from the summer for an appropriate moment. Perhaps that is now.

A while back I promised to tell you about Muffy, but maybe you would prefer something else first? It's readers choice here on the Alonso channel:

🐶

Muffy the Alonso Slayer
60%
Crouching Puppy, Hidden Alonso
26.7%
Let Sleeping Dogs Lie (feat. the Dagwood Dogs)
13.3%
Poll ended at .
All right then, up first is Muffy the Alonso Slayer!

"Muffy the Alonso Slayer"

Alonso may be small, but he bosses around much larger dogs. He is the Chef des Chiens around these parts, with one exception: Muffy the Alonso Slayer.

On our regular walks to the lac with Alonso we pass by a small group of houses near the road. Unlike most of the rural properties around here, these have fences and gates, and many are holiday homes occupied only for the summer.

In one of these houses lives Muffy during the summer months, along with her Dutch humans.

Muffy is (probably) not the name her humans call her, but it is what we have called her since the first time we saw her.

Muffy is a very small Maltese terrier about half the height of our hero.

Your first impression when seeing Muffy is that the mop end has come off, and the handle must be around here somewhere. She's small and white and yappy. It is impossible to pass by without her making quite a fuss.

It is clear that, in her mind at least, she is the fierce decendant of wolves, but she has neither the stature nor the vocal chords to be taken seriously. 🐺

Usually Muffy is well fenced in, but on our way to the lac we passed her out for a walk and stopped for a chat with her Dutch owners. We explained that Alonso is not our dog, but he visits and we take him for walks. This caused some confusion, but not for the usual reason.

"Why do you not have a dog?!" they asked, clearly quite astonished.

The question was so abrupt and serious that I scrabbled to find an appropriate response. I explained that we used to travel a lot, and hoped that this was the correct answer.

They seemed to accept this, so I think we passed. ✅

Meanwhile, Alonso and Muffy were at a standoff.

Alonso was obviously very taken with Muffy, but any time he tried to greet her she rebuffed him with the most vicious of snarls. It is the only time we've seen Alonso being bossed by another dog.

I crouched to pat her, and she alternated between accepting pats and snarling at poor Alonso any time he approached!

After a while we said our goodbyes and walked on, but we've often had a smile and wave from them when we're passing on our way to the lac with Alonso.

Muffy is away for the winter now, but Alonso always stops to sniff the gate when we pass. We've no doubt the Slayer will return in a few months when the weather is warmer.

Alonso was collected this evening while we were having dinner. He refused to go and had to be lured outside with a bowl of bolognaise.

Alonso arrived at first light this morning when it was about -8°C.

We went out to chop some wood just now. He looked at the snow and decided to stay inside.

We were gone all of ten minutes. With the fuss he made when we got back you'd think we'd been gone for days.

Alonso has carefully assessed the rain and slush outside and decided that it will not do. 🌧️

@dentangle true story, last week I went down a couple houses to quickly drop something for a neighbor as I walked back into view my dog was staring out the gate and got all excited I was coming back

I waved and he looked behind himself to see who I was waving at

When no one was there he turned back to me and started jumping up and down even more excited that I was coming home

The dog version of "who me?" and winning the big prize

Dogs are awesome

@dentangle
What is the usual reason?

@dentangle these names are just 👨🏽‍🍳😘

(also, I seriously hope you are keeping these anecdotes to compile into a book someday)

@dentangle

I am not voting because I can't vote for all three. 😄

(I'm happy with any / all / going with majority vote. 😊 )

@dentangle Hrm. Given that it's effectively a rotten/partially fermented vegetable with pickling and extra flavours, and most dogs will eat anything that's rotting, I'm not entirely surprised.

Classy tastes though!

@dentangle We have a dog here who LOVES fruits & vegetables. Lettuce is more fascinating to him than meat. I'm not at all surprised by the kim chi; this guy would probably go nuts for it as well.

@dentangle his WUFF is actually

Encore des saucisses, s'il vous plaît !

@dentangle you could say that they are a depreciating asset

@dentangle that is a really nice idea! 😀 It is also refreshing to hear about her dad's efforts in teaching her the land and the woods. I wish more parents did that. We'll have a 3.5 year-old visiting for The Thing tomorrow and maybe he will be taught by his dad eventually.

Around here they have so-called "forest kindergartens" which is a fantastic concept. They have a building but whenever possible will be outdoors playing in the dirt and learning practical things. ❤️

@dentangle failing everything else I plan to take him (and his dad) to the forest when practical. He can start by pulling branches onto the hedges and then work his way up through collecting disks and eventually give me a hand cutting trees.