So it seems “Shup Up Wesley” Streeting’s desire to stop people being diagnosed with ADHD, as if that’s a thing the NHS actually does, has met with some pushback in the press.

Before coming to that, I can only wonder why he’s taking the approach of “fix ADHD by pretending it doesn’t exist”. I do know a group of people who are bad at remembering things exist if they can’t see them and … well, Wesley, I know a guy …

But I digress (do you find yourself digressing a lot? I know a guy) …

Where was I? I forget. Does this happen a lot to you? SQUIRREL!

CONCENTRATE, SARAH!

Right, so after his media round he’s decided that he wants to investigate what causes ADHD.

I can save him the time. Pay attention, Wesley. If you struggle with that, then … oh FFS

Anyway, sometimes a mummy chaos goblin and a daddy chaos goblin get limerence at each other and they go to the shop for condoms but instead they come back with three kilos of cheese, a USB C cable that will sit in a drawer with the fifty others they never use because they never open the drawer other than to put USB C cables in, a bottle of ketchup because the one in the fridge is out of date (they will not remove it from the fridge), and a wetsuit.

They will not have bought condoms.

Oh well. YOLO. Weird and probably quite kinky sex will ensue because chaos goblins Do Be Like That™ and then 9 months later a pure distilled essence of Loki will pop out and start screaming, until it sees a squirrel.

Does that answer your question, Wesley? Would you like to hear some cool stuff about trains?