with another SARS-CoV-2 wave in full swing here's a few reminders for the few of you that still care about yourself or others:

1) COVID isn't just a respiratory infection, it spreads through the cardiovascular system and infects pretty much everything. every infection causes damage, the question isn't if but just where and how much. you might get obvious long COVID symptoms. or you might just have a heart attack a year or two later without warning. the statistics on long COVID are misleading cause they only capture what can be diagnosed. 10-20% cumulative risk should still be scary enough, but it doesn't mean that the rest come away entirely unscathed.

2) you can pass on infections without showing symptoms, and the risk of that is actually very high. you'll be infectious before showing symptoms and many infections with SARS-CoV-2 stay asymptomatic. you can still hurt or kill people even if you feel fine. you can still come away with long term damage if you feel fine too, that just means your immune system didn't react that strongly.

3) masks are effective to protect you and your community but not all masks are equal and they need to be used correctly. first of all you want a proper respirator mask with a meltblown filter medium. cloth masks are only minimally protective. surgical masks have a filter medium but a lot of air can easily pass around the mask. these are better than better than nothing but shouldn't be relied on. make sure you have a mask that properly seals around your face. this is the biggest factor in whether a mask will be effective. better quality masks can have lower breathing resistance, which isn't just a comfort thing, but helps protect you by reducing pressure pushing air through gaps around the mask. if you feel air pushing around your mask it's not protecting you as well as it should.

4) there's nothing magical about being outside that will protect you or others. you can just get infected there or pass on an infection. it's just a matter of enough virions getting into the system to cause an infection. with close contact, dense crowds, prolonged contact etc. infection risk goes up even outside.

5) since it's getting cold in many parts of the northern hemisphere now also a reminder that the cold will temporarily weaken the immune system in your respiratory tract, increasing your risk of contracting an infection both outside and for a bit after coming back inside. wearing a mask outside can help with keeping you warm too.

would like really appreciate if you didn't try to hurt or kill me and everyone I care about. seriously.
@elexia am thinking about upgrading my mask again (currently only wearing ffp2 masks, but maybe will go with a2p3 resp again)
@commentator2_0 we just do FFP2s too but honestly as long as you get good fit these are pretty damn good. it's just that most FFP2s are kinda ass, with high breathing resistance and bad fit. we use 3M Auras and those work well for us. we have an elastomeric respirator with source control, but the fit isn't that good on us, it builds up condensation easily and it's only rated for P2 cartridges too. was considering getting something better, but not having source control limits when and how we wanna use them.
@elexia the disadvantage of a2 filters is that they are not available with source control. (As they would immediately get clogged up with the things we breath out) But tbh, f others for not even wearing any kind of mask in public transport, and sorry, but i prefer not to get triggered and/or health issues due to breathing in cigarette or grass smoke
@commentator2_0 yeah, smokers are so fucking awful constantly making others breathe this shit.
@elexia so, a genuine question, i know that tone doesn't come across in text very well at all, but please know that this is coming from a place of ignorance, not of a desire to be inflammatory, though i know it was used that way and... i suppose, for reference, i'm a states dweller, this stuff has been out of the general public's mind for a while now, barring like, boosters, at best

but, did the vaccinations not do as intended?
why i'm asking is that wearing masks or covering my face with anything makes me extremely anxious, i'm not an anti-masker or a COVID denier by any stretch, before the vaccinations were available, i wore them when i went out in public, opting to isolate the majority of the time.. but, for reference, i ended up quitting my job over that anxiety (lucky enough to still be living with my parents at the time, dunno what i'd do now...)
and like, i still do wear them when i know i'm sick, with anything, on the off chance that i can't just stay home

and, i know it seems like a lot of ramble and explanation just to be cagey about the actual question here, but like, i know the frequent reactions when questioning masking practices basically at all... i lost friends, i was basically called a murderer, and mind, that was towards the tail end when vaccines were becoming widely available
now, we're at the point here where even they probably wouldn't care anymore...

just.. i don't want to hurt anyone... but i don't want to be on edge anytime i'm in public either... how can i do that?

and i know the probable response is going to be to go kick rocks or get over it... barely even know why i spent the time writing this out..
sorry...
@tidest vaccines drastically reduced severe acute infections resulting in deaths and hospitalizations, but they aren't very effective in preventing infections, their efficacy for that is only moderate and drops drastically within a few months of getting a shot. the problem is that COVID still causes some long term damage even in vaccinated folks. worst case this can leave someone disabled or cut years off of someone's life.
the media narrative has largely been that this is only relevant for "vulnerable" populations, that is older people and people with disabilities and that we shouldn't care about those dying, but this isn't true, anyone can get long COVID, every infection carries a substantial risk and if we get infected repeatedly it's basically guaranteed that we either become disabled by it or die before we can be. we have media and politicians pretending the pandemic is over so we can keep creating profit and don't build solidarity and this has been very effective, but excess death is still up, it's just that there aren't lots of people dying from acute infections. they'll get a heart attack cause of the damage to their cardiovascular system, or die in a traffic accident or from Alzheimer's cause of the damage to their brain. and people can pretend these aren't COVID deaths even though COVID is a contributing factor in them.
I wish I had the ability to help you with your issue, but while I have a little bit of background in psychology I am neither a psychologist nor a therapist. anxiety is treatable, but I know it's not easy. I also have an anxiety disorder. if you can get professional help for it that could be very helpful. aside from that I think the best bet is probably to carefully work with exposure. starting in situations that are controlled and don't cause additional anxiety, maybe with a friend there if that helps. make sure you have tools that you know are effective at calming yourself and start small, with the least scary thing that you can imagine for this. start with a short time while calming yourself and then after reassure yourself that you are safe and that it was okay. small steps over time. that's the best I can offer based on my knowledge of anxiety disorders. someone specialized in this sort of work would probably be helpful.
wishing you success.
@elexia thank you, for taking the time to help me understand and offering a potential solution
i've got contact with a therapist that's been helping me with other issues, i'll certainly have to bring it up next time we meet... which.. is probably the thought i should've had in the first place

and, thank you, again, for not just dismissing or ignoring me, i probably shouldn't have fallen apart like that to begin with
@tidest you came to us in good faith so we responded in kind. no one is helped by us being dismissive or judgemental when you're asking for help.