virtualizing OPNsense is....not going great - sh.itjust.works

I want to collapse all my little boxes into one powerful box. Ram is super pricy so I built a rig based on the ryzen 5800xt and bought a motherboard that cant PCI passthru the NIC by mistake. Before ordering another motherboard that can passthru the NIC, I booted up bare metal and compared the performance to how it ran virtualized in fedora server. it was better, but still not hitting line level. direct macbook to cable modem: 916/40 opnsense virtualized (with vlans and rules): 699/41 opnsense bare metal (with vlans and rules): 816/39 opnsense bare metal (with vlans and rules and hardware offload fully enabled): 824/40 the only rules in place were the defaults, the rule to block vlans from talking to eachother, and the rule to pass traffic to WAN. when virtualized, I cannot get PCI passthru so I was using macvtap interfaces and virtuio drivers with 4 threads and 4 pinned CPU threads. CPU is a ryzen 5800XT NIC is a dual port intel I226V when virtualized, it was running under fedora server with QEMU/KVM q35 and given 8gigs of ram with hugepage memory and tested in both 2 and 4 thread resource allocation (all confirmed to be on the same 1 or 2 physical cores as the threads) and eventually even giving 4 threads to the virtuio driver (it was only claiming 1 thread before). Bare metal IS definitely helping, so it looks like I need to swap out for a motherboard that can do proper PCI passthru of the NIC (now that I understand the limitations of IOMMU groups they specs of the board dont tell you about I hate them all the more.) but it still cant hit line rates. Theres no IDS or suricata or any of the fanciness turned on yet though, so I just dont understand why its this slow even bare metal.