My Ex (22) was polyamorous, I (23) wish I took the opportunity to watch her get intimate with her other partner’s. - Lemmy NSFW

I had my first date with this girl, and it was exceptional. She was charming, attractive, and wonderful in every respect. On our second date, we were planning to go to the movies, but before the show started, she shared that she was polyamorous. This revelation was not what I had expected; she wanted to keep seeing other people and pursuing romantic and physical relationships with them. At the tail end of our second date, we had a long, heart-to-heart talk about our emotions. Despite my feelings becoming overwhelmed, I hadn’t felt a connection like this before. In the end, I chose to take a risk and see where things went with her. The time we spent together was always wonderful, but there was a lingering sense of discomfort due to her occasional mentions of other people she’d seen or been involved with. As soon as she brought up these people, my heart would sink and I’d feel sad. One time, we were talking on the phone and she casually mentioned finding a condom had fallen out of her purse, which she had to put back. This comment filled me with sadness because I knew that it wasn’t meant for us; it was intended for someone else to use when they were intimate with her. Another time, we were on our way to her place when she decided to tell me about this black guy she had been seeing, she wanted to mention it, because it was playing on her mind, above his bed, was a confederate flag, my GF at the time, got dicked down by BBC under a confederate fucking flag. During a different occasion that I was at hers, I noticed that she had handcuffs hanging on the bed headboard, it looked like they had been used recently, the two of us never used them together, she had no intention of using them with me. It really hurt to hear and see all this kind of stuff, she was my princess, my angel, my everything, she told me one day that it would just be me and her, then she went out finding other men, to fuck. I told her one day, that I wish I could be by her every second of every day, that I adore her that much, she thought for a second, and laughed, asking if I would sit in the corner while she was being intimate. At that moment I was serious, it hurt a lot, she took a loving heartfelt moment, and slapped me with a “you could watch me fuck other lol” A little while later, we broke up, after some time, I started thinking about her with her other partners, and thinking about when she jokingly mentioned letting me watch her get fucked, and now, I regret not taking my chance, I regret not saying, yeah let me watch you. When I get really horny, I just cant help but think of her take these faceless men, imaging her doggy style, hearing her moans, imagining her moaning louder than she ever has done for her, I wish I could rewind time, and sit in the corner of her room, and jerk one out to her getting railed hard.