Oh hey, engagement. I’m sorry that I’m unable to think of a way to articulate that without sounding sarcastic, but I do sincerely appreciate actual engagement.
Stop caring
Uh, no. While I believe I didn’t even suggest such a thing, I will also acknowledge that it’s possible I didn’t adequately articulate my primary point. In no way will I ever say to just stop caring, as that’s unrealistic, counterproductive, and just plain silly. My primary point, especially as it relates to the original post, is to accept reality as it is-WITHOUT inserting an opinion. Your feelings will happen no matter what. You can’t let them dictate your response, but you also can’t make them go away. The point isn’t to stop caring, but to redirect what you care about with full cognitive intent. The point is to focus on what you control and to use what you control to influence your desired outcome.
Get therapy
I mean, maybe? I thought my mentioning of therapy was more of a presentation of an option rather than a primary point, but once again I acknowledge that communication is a two way street and I must do my best to clearly articulate my point. To be clear, I don’t think therapy is technically necessary and I didn’t directly suggest it as I had considered a similar point as to what you have made about the monetary cost. Honestly, what they would ultimately be doing in therapy is to try to change the way you frame things by focusing on what you control. There are multiple approaches, but it usually involves figuring out what core beliefs you have that lead you to the targeted bad outcomes and challenging those core beliefs. This is certainly something you can do on your own, but therapy can help build the skills and awareness to do it effectively. But, once again, therapy isn’t technically necessary for such a thing.
I think it’s important for me to reiterate in a manner I believe to be very clear: The point is to engage with reality. The point is to confront your feelings. The point is to self-reflect with honesty. You don’t control what happens to you, but you do have control over your reaction to it. If your focus is on the circumstances, then you will forever be a victim to those circumstances. Yes, things happened to you, just and unjust, but what are you going to do about it?