HairyHypnotistLast weekend, I was at #SpellboundCon in Germany, near Cologne. Spellbound is a convention for #EroticHypnosis, welcoming people of all ages (above 18), genders, and sexualities. It was fun, educational, thought-provoking, and got me out of my comfort zone in several respects — which meant that I was uncomfortable at times. Would I go back next year? Absolutely!
#SpellboundCon was a lot larger than I expected: roughly 80 hypno-kinksters! The event went from Friday to Sunday, and included meals and accommodation: we were assigned shared bedrooms when we arrived. @Frank_NL and I were assigned to a 3-person room, with one other guy that we didn’t know.
I would estimate that the group was 50% femme-presenting, 30% masc-presenting, and 20% in-between (non-binary). I was initially disappointed by the number of gay men: there were maybe 7 or 8 of us (including @Frank_NL and me) and I already knew most of them. There were many heterosexual couples, and I assumed that all of those people were straight; I found out later that there was much more sexual fluidity than I thought.
Many people taught classes at #SpellboundCon, so there were plenty of opportunities to learn and get inspired! I taught a class as well: the same “Intro to Erotic Hypnosis” class that I’ve taught at #Darklands many times. However, at Darklands, most people were unfamiliar with #hypnosis; at Spellbound, everyone knew the basics already, and I realized (while standing in front of the audience) that I didn’t have enough content to teach an actual class about the topic.
Instead, I spent a lot of time talking about some of the experiences I’ve had with #EroticHypnosis and some of the fun things I’ve done with it, and I invited (ordered) @Frank_NL to stand up and do the same. We took questions from the audience, and encouraged them to share their stories and experiences, as well. I think the end result was very successful, even if it wasn’t what I expected!
I also facilitated a group discussion about a controversial topic in the #EroticHypnosis community: whether it’s acceptable to combine erotic hypnosis with hypnotherapy. I kicked off the discussion by saying that I do so, and invited others to ask questions and share their thoughts and perspectives. Fortunately, everyone was friendly and polite, and while there were definitely disagreements, nobody lost their temper. I’d call that a success!
On Friday evening, after the first set of classes, I started talking with @deepunder, and it was clear there was an instant connection. In addition to being a sexy guy, he was also very interested in being hypnotized and showing off his body while doing so — a delicious combination! When @Frank_NL joined the conversation, it seemed like all three of us were interested in each other.
@deepunder mentioned that he was not part of a group, so I suggested that maybe he could swap bedrooms so that all three of us could share a room; he definitely liked that idea! After a few quick conversations with others to make sure it wasn’t a problem, we made the switch. Later that night, we moved the beds together, and all three of us had some steamy erotic hypnotic fun together. 😈
The #SpellboundCon organizers did a great job with ensuring there was plenty of downtime for getting to know other attendees, and plenty of opportunities for hypnotic play — including an actual play party on the con schedule! I got to know several other people, and made some friendships that I hope to maintain in the future. But I did remarkably little hypnosis; the three-way trance with @Frank_NL and @deepunder was the only significant session I did for the entire weekend.
Part of that was due to low energy: I had been traveling for a week before the event started, and that took more of a toll on my energy level than I expected. Part of it was the way I approach new situations: I always like to observe from a safe distance before I engage, and there were a lot of new situations and new people to observe. But I think part of it was also a reluctance to engage in a sexual activity (hypnosis) with/around people that I didn’t see as part of my “tribe” of gay men.
I’ve started examining that idea in my mind, and it’s not one that I’m proud of. Everyone at #SpellboundCon was so friendly and welcoming, and we all share the same kink. I’d like to open up more and explore this with more people; it doesn’t have to *only* be gay men, especially considering the wide range of gender expressions that I saw at the con.
Just before we left #SpellboundCon on Sunday, a female attendee pulled me aside. We had chatted a little bit during the weekend, and I had a very positive impression of her; she told me that she felt similarly towards me, and asked if I would hypnotize her briefly, just so she could experience my style of hypnosis. Nothing sexual, just relaxation. I checked my emotions, and realized that I was happy and eager to do so!
We did the hypnosis session outdoors, with a few other attendees watching and listening in. It was a very short hypnosis session, maybe 5 minutes or so, and it went very smoothly. She told me afterwards that she enjoyed it a lot, and the others watching seemed to appreciate it as well; I even got a compliment from another hypnotist!
I’d like to push myself more, try new things, and explore doing hypnosis with people outside of my standard “tribal” comfort zone. I’m glad that I started doing so, and I want to attend more erotic hypnosis conventions in the future; apparently, there are several in Europe! And hopefully, the next time I do, I’ll already know some of the people I see there, and I’ll feel more comfortable diving in and doing more hypnosis during the event. 😵💫
ocnurb@HairyHypnotist I faced similar things with my first hypnocon and it made me reflect on how my own experiences of gay spaces was sex positive in very specific ways but also quite insular in many others. Things got easier pretty quickly though, hope you find the same.
Incogg@HairyHypnotist I was also concerned about mixed gender events when I just started going to those; but people in the BDSM community and the EH community subset are in general accepting and open, and playing with people outside of my comfort zone can be rewarding as well.