I am now being required by my day job to use an AI assistant to write code. I have also been informed that my usage of AI assistants will be monitored and decisions about my career will be based on those metrics.

I gave it an honest shot today, using it as responsibly as I know how: only use it for stuff I already know how to do, so that I can easily verify its output. That part went ok, though I found it much harder to context switch between thinking about code structure and trying to herd a bullshit generator into writing correct code.

One thing I didn't expect, though, is how fucking disruptive it's suggestion feature would be. It's like trying to compose a symphony while someone is relentlessly playing a kazoo in your ear. It flustered me really quickly, to the point where I wasn't able to figure out how to turn that "feature" off. I'm noticing physical symptoms of an anxiety attack as a result.

I stopped work early when I noticed I was completely spent. I don't know if I wrote more code today than I would have normally. I don't think I wrote better code, as the vigilance required is extremely hard for my particular brand of neurospicy to maintain.

As far as the "write this function for me" aspect, I've noticed that I tend to use the mental downtime of typing out a function I've designed to let my brain percolate on the solution and internalize it so I have it in my working memory. This doesn't happen when I'm simply reviewing code written by something else. Reviewing code and writing it are completely separate activities for me. But there's nothing to keep my fingers and thoughts busy while I'm coming up with what to write next.

I didn't think we were meant to live like this.