Kit Rhett AultmanJul 5
Faith, purple-haired feminist   

When I first started my transition, I cared a lot about the reasons I was trans. I had a whole thing about how my story lined up with other trans people, about what I wanted and for how long, etc. I felt like I had to prove it to myself, if no one else. I had to be sure. I had to be able to justify it to every person I came out to.

Now? I kinda don't give a shit. I am. Good enough. Anyone who says otherwise can fuck off.

Jul 5 at 4:54amWeb
Show threadFaith, purple-haired feminist   Jul 5

Which is to say that if you're pretty new to this whole gender exploration thing and you're struggling with confidence and you feel the need to prove yourself... If that's you, you're not alone. It's okay to feel that way and, no, it doesn't last forever.

If you look at people like me and see confidence you feel you'll never have, then congratulations! You're just like me from 3 years ago.

There's no shame in that. 💜💚

Show thread🟥 Eveline Sulman 🇳🇱🇪🇺🇺🇦Jul 5
@faithisleaping this is also a reminder to us, cis people: every trans person has their own history full of their own thoughts and ups and downs.
Show threadFaith, purple-haired feminist   Jul 5
@EvelineSulman It's also a reminder that if a trans person comes out to you, especially early on in their transition, you need to give them room to grow and change. If they give you one story when they first come out and then another 6 months later, that's okay. It takes time to figure yourself out and there's often hidden stuff we've even forgotten ourselves.
Show threadjnpegay, emphasis on the “gay”Jul 5

@faithisleaping @EvelineSulman this was one of the scariest parts of transition to me. i think it’s related to RSD/growing up neurodivergent, but telling people something about myself and then needing to revise it later is a massive anxiety source. i held off on telling anyone but my very closest people for quite a while because i couldn’t stand the thought of telling them something that might change.

very grateful to everyone who was chill when things did change along the way.

Show threadFaith, purple-haired feminist   Jul 5

@jepyang Yeah, same, especially knowing that most of the people I was coming out to knew nothing about trans people. I wanted to be sure I knew what to tell them and I was deathly afraid they'd weaponize any lack of certainty.

@EvelineSulman

Show threadAndrewJul 5
@faithisleaping this 🐻🐻🐻🐻🐻🐻🐻
Show threadJenny ​ Jul 5
@faithisleaping Big same.
Show threadSophie, 🇮🇪 editionJul 5

@faithisleaping Yeah, I think I’m starting to have this shift. And I’m glad that I pulled at the thread and understood the narrative behind why I was trans and how I was trans and for how long I had been trans during the first couple years after I cracked.

But now? It’s pretty simple. I like being a girl. So I’m going to be one. 💅

Show threadimdat celeste aurora    [witchzard]Jul 5
@faithisleaping  
Show threadKit Rhett AultmanJul 5
@faithisleaping I think the other thing that goes without enough conversation is that transition changes how you appear to yourself and others and that also changes you, your goals, etc. When I started out, I felt I *had* to show my ability to be femme to show this was real to me. It was also a surefire way to keep other people from calling me "sir". Now that my facial hair is gone, though, I'm "ma'am" more than I'm not, and I'm watching my inner tomboy come out.
Show threadErikJul 5
@faithisleaping I feel like the only way I speedran my way to not giving a shit is having a lot of trans friends since my 20s and not coming out until I was almost 40. :)
Show threadFaith, purple-haired feminist   Jul 5
@bright_helpings I feel like I kinda did a speed run, too, at least relative to where I started. Homeschooled conservative Midwestern Evangelical to purple-hatred trans girl feminist is quite a long way. 😂
Show threadTonya Marie 🏳️‍⚧️Jul 5
@faithisleaping At this point, if you asked me "why did you transition / how did you realize you were trans", it would be hard to answer, because I just am. It's very much in the "Well, how did you realize you were cis?" stage. And that's cool, actually.
Show threadFaith, purple-haired feminist   Jul 5

@TonyaMarie It really is. 💜

The only reason we have something to realize or figure out is because we've done so much repression. Once that's gone, it's obvious.