What, so Cthulhu isn’t real? But I hear his voice. Who else could command me to torture and eat all those stupid noisy kids?
Shub-Niggurath, the All-Mother. Cthulhu does not have interest in pesky kids.

It’s all a part of Azathoth’s dream anyway, long may they slumber.

Those kids were just figments, but then so are we.

Who else could command me to torture and eat all those stupid noisy kids

The eternal hunger.

Of course he’s real! Don’t let those filthy unbelievers confuse you! Keep up the good work!