Alice McFlurry 
I went to the doctor to ask about a weird bump on my torso and she said "that seems fine, but what's up with this weird mole on your neck?"
So, uh, like and subscribe to follow me on my super cool journey.
For those following along on my mole adventure, here's the story.
In 2021, Kev took a photo of me hanging out on a patio with a stranger's dog and I was like "What's up with that weird mole on my neck? Where did that come from?" and he was like "What do you mean? That's always been there?"
I didn't know if I was Mandela Effecting or what, but I was just like "Oh okay I guess I never realized I had a big gross mole on my neck but I guess it's fine if it's been there for my entire life or at least the last 15+ years you've known me?"
Then I just ignored it until my doctor mentioned it in my annual physical earlier this week.
In the meantime, I started looking through old photos and somehow none of them show the right side of my neck and/or my hair is covering that area so I can't see anything, but I did finally find one photo from 2019 and there definitely wasn't a mole, so at least I’m not crazy. But that does mean the mole is sus AF.
I've since had a biopsy so we'll see where that lands, but I wanted to post photos to prove that I once looked like a normal person without a little goblin creature thing growing on my neck.
Annie in ProgressIf you get too proud of it Slice, you'll have to cut peek-a-boo holes in all your turtlenecks. 💗
@LikeItOrLumpIt This is such a good idea!! Prior to this, I had only set my sights as high as getting a tattoo of a big ole booty around it.
Jeffy 🏳️⚧️🏳️🌈🇺🇦 ❤️🇱🇺
LAURENYou mean Alnus
@noondlyt @godofbiscuits 😂 GODDAMNIT
it was right there
sometimes your threads feel like a good beach volleyball match
No, you made the perfect set
@noondlyt @godofbiscuits I’m just glad I didn't go to grade school with you because it was bad enough having kids call me "Alisp" that I don't think I would survive being called "Alnus."
lolz I would have fixed them good
Simon Keating@Psimonkey10 Is that another little gem from Vonnegut?
0x575446, Fifth Columnist"When I became captain of the town, I decided to extend asylum to certain citizens who were persona non grata elsewhere in the area because of their disgusting and disquieting deformities.
One was known as Spare Ass Annie. She had an auxiliary asshole in the middle of her forehead, like a baneful bronze eye."
--William S. Burroughs
pkprotoplasm (MOVED)@Alice best wishes, good on you for not messing around with it and getting it out asap
Joshua A.C. Newman@Alice Congratulations on the new installation!
@JoshuaACNewman Thank you!!
Joe Hill 🇵🇸🇺🇦
Bonkers@Alice 'tis but a scratch
I realize it's been a bit since I've updated you on my dumb mole.
So, it turns out that it's melanoma, but my doctor said it was a minimal amount and essentially stage 0 cancer which I didn't even realize was a thing, so I’m not THAT concerned.
Earlier today, I had my appointment to remove the entire little goblin and its surrounding area and the doctor gave me two options which consisted of either leaving me with a scar that's about 4 inches long or a puckered circle, so of course I picked the butthole option.
Follow along to see how my little goatse heals!
Deus Ex MacGuffin 
@DXMacGuffin Thank you! I've always felt like one sphincter wasn't nearly enough.
Here's to the eradication of that thing!
@noondlyt If it heals poorly, I’m definitely going to get some sort of butthole tattoo over it.
If it ends up being a tight pucker, I'll get the Vonnegut asterisk butthole.
If it ends up being a little gapey, I'll get some little hands tattooed on to complete my sweet little goatse portal to hell.
(JK @KevBot I swear I’m not going to get a butthole tattoo on my neck)
Staff Chief of Joints@the_etrain @noondlyt @KevBot Ohhhhh shit. I was kidding about getting a tattoo on my neck, but this could really sway me.
Sorry, Kev. Blame @the_etrain.
Oh gosh! Best possible outcome my luv! 💗
@LikeItOrLumpIt I was thinking about it and, if this is skin cancer, it's all on me. I’m very good about applying sunscreen to my face, but when I think back on it, I don't think I’m very good at extending it down my neck.
Either way, everyone, please regularly apply sunscreen and ensure you cover not just your face but also your neck and any other part of your body that gets exposed to the sun because the sun is a brutal beast and I don’t think anyone wants skin cancer or a gross mole or even a sunburn and SPF is an easy way to protect against all of that.
@Alice
That's very good advice. I should be more diligent too. Very fair skin.
I need to think about maybe having my whole body checked.
Everything's going to be alright Alice. Your doc caught it now and you will be checked out. <BIG HUG>
Richard Hendricks@Alice @LikeItOrLumpIt Always check your meds too! One of my #diabetesT2 meds has a warning that you have to wear sunscreen/sun protection at all times when outside.
cobalt@Alice @LikeItOrLumpIt WORD: Costco has a 2-pack of a brand-name sunscreen with SPF 50 for really cheap. It’s like $12 for 2 giant bottles.
I go to dermatologist once a year to stare at every mole or skin tag. I get a lot more as I age. And this, thanks to white, Northern European genes. Since both parents and 1 grandparent all had “pre-cancerous” moles on their face, all 3 had outpatient surgery to remove. That is not going to be my fate. Mostly I end up having the nitrogen freezing treatment for annoying ones. Ouch ouch ouch. This year I vow more frequent hat and sunscreen. Arizona sun is brutal.
RolloTreadway@Alice Good luck, I hope it turns out to be thoroughly benign and easily addressed.
Nick 'The Viking'🤞 BIG HUG
(((Klefstadmyr)))@Alice Good to hear you're getting it looked at.
Logan Five Thousand
@LoganFive I mean, I "caught" it at least 3 years after I first noticed it, but at least it's getting checked out!
@Alice But like mole years are reverse dog years, so that’s like you caught it yesterday.
🧮 😊
🧮 😊
Mat BEverything crossed for you 🤞
Bytebro 🇬🇧 🇺🇦 🇬🇱Same same. Had a 'thing' removed from my arm a year back, and that was all good, thankfully. I'm hugely paranoid about such because I lost all 3 of my siblings plus my late fianceé to various types of cancer.
I sincerely hope it turns out to be fine.
Ultramundane@Alice I keep hoping I'll grow a second head like in "How to Get Ahead in Advertising" but so far nothing. (Thinking negative thoughts for your biopsy. I should really self-refer to my husbands dermatologist too.)
glasspshr@Alice hugs, Slice! I’ve had larger parts of me removed and I’m still laughing about it!
Laurel Stvan@Alice Damn. You never know where the next surprise is coming from. Good luck.
@LingLass Worst case is I get to fast track my retirement!
Andrew FeeneyAlice: "Why are you asking *me* about the weird mole!? I came to *you* for medical advice! You are the doctor!"
Doctor: *opens up google image search*
Bobsee@Alice Best wishes for a quick recovery
Just Tired
Pianosaurus 🕴@Alice Why am I imagining you with a small, subterranean animal biting your neck? "What, him? That's just Bob. Been there since my last hiking trip. What about him?"
@pianosaurus Bob can hear every word you're saying, so maybe don’t call him weird, OKAY?!?
David Cohen@Alice I had a similar conversation with my doctor. I told him the weird mole on my neck was my head, so he prescribed me some therapy. I like to think we were both satisfied with the outcome.
@Alice good luck, Slice.
Nick@Alice this seems like a start of a YouTube recipe channel
"How to make tiramisu... But first let me tell you about my mole"
"How to make tiramisu... But first let me tell you about my mole"