General_EffortGood News, Everyone!
April first, innit
Oh yeah. Not being on whatever that spezhole is anymore, I forgot all the fun, . . . really fun hijinks that go on.
Given this ain’t a joke it’s really not far to get to the OP
But, yep, fair enough. Ha ha.
Man April first escaped me completely. Nobody tried a single joke on me this year.
Not American. People seem to be just getting more and more tired regardless of country.
Every April fools joke I encountered this year seemed to make me mad. Maybe I just feel now isn’t a time to be joking, even though unfortunately it’s likely the most important time for a laugh.
Problem is all the people making the jokes have a shit sense of humour.
Could also be just you with the shit sense of humor. Ever thought of that? But then there is no way to objectively measure it, so what’s the point in even thinking about it?
Almost like we all see different parts of the internet so we don’t even know what everyone is looking at and feeling about what they’re seeing.
what’s the point in even thinking about it?
To share my feelings with people on here? If you don’t feel what I’m feeling then good for you, I’m happy you enjoyed your day.
It hasn’t been time to joke for the last 10 years it feels like
ChrisFix did a Tesla oil change video. LockPickingLawyer has a one eyed monster.
ChrisFix has never seemed political in any way so I’m assuming the video was prepared and potentially filmed before all the DOGE controversy and maybe even before whole nazi salute thing. It was certainly a very high quality video that must’ve taken a long time to make.
Other than these two, I’ve not even seen a joke. Those videos at least are jokes that aren’t at anyone else’s expense.
How to Replace the Oil in a Tesla
I never owned an EV before in my life. and until today I thought they require oil change, because the engine.
I can see one thinking that, gotta lubricate and cool something right? But nah electrics tend to do 1 motor in each wheel
1 motor in each wheel is ultra high end. 1-2 motors is most common.
They’re lubricated too, but the lube is supposed to be actual lifetime lube and isn’t the same as engine oil
Yeah the lube they use would be closer the machine oil than automotive oil
Now you know one reason why GM Killed The Electric Car
When everythin feels like a joke, you stop caring as much
Oooh. That was yesterday.
cm0002Jk! Unless…
They should rewrite it in Rust.
Until goobleblobble comes out, then we have to rewrite in that. And so on, until the end of time.
It’s not memory safe.
What was the language again?
baduhaiI vote for gobblebobble!
Not sure if I get the joke, is FFmpeg considered slow? That’s the only angle I can think of for the joke to work… am I missing something?
henfredemarsI believe you’re overthinking it. The only relation to the project is likely that they have assembly language developers on the team to help implement accelerated format conversions.
It’s a genuine xeet(?).
hoshikarakitaridiaMan let’s just stick to tweet. This whole x thing is too silly even for April fools.
DOGE said they’re going to rewrite the existing SSA code, which is done in COBOL, to modernize it, and everyone is pointing out how fraught with peril that is. This is saying they’re going to do it in assembly, which is what we do when we need highly efficient code, like for a resource-constrained real-time control system, but is also much more challenging to program. The chance of rewriting a giant COBOL application in Assembly, and not making a whole mess of errors, is really small. And it would be very hard to maintain.
Also assembly is even older than COBOL.
I’m unsure if this is also an April fools joke
In broad terms it’s true, though there are some variants of assembly that are newer than COBOL.
Assembly language is one step above machine code, and was the first large step toward a world where people write server-side code in Javascript.
Assembly is machine code, but with words and hexideci numbers instead of 1s and 0s and comments/white space, it’s barely a language, from the 40s.
COBOL is a compiled language from the 60s. The compiler turns the somewhat human-readable code into assembly the computer can read.
it’s barely a language
Maybe barely, but I imagine most assembly variants have conveniences like labels for jumps, labels for referencing data included in the executable, and at least some also have things like simple macros or calculating mathematical expressions at compiletime.
Poplar?Assembly isnt a single language though. I could write assembly for riscv or a recent arm ISA and that would be quite new.
I wondered if maybe “assembly” gets used to mean x86 but apparently thats a bunch newer than COBOL so I dont think Im being pedantic :)
Just get the guy that made rollercoaster Tycoon in Assembly, he’ll knock it over in a week.
4,601 Guest "Accident" in Roller Coaster Tycoon
I should add that the FFmpeg team is quite proud of the fact that they write in C and Assembly for peak performance. They mention it a lot, and so they did here.
64k scene but with suits.
Male Pregnancy?
Final Fantasy Mpreg
Government helplines about to get 1000% more hostile and standoffish.
blitzenI unironically would rather FFmpeg be in charge of, well, anything instead of Musk.
FFmpeg crashes: unfortunate
SpaceX crashes: dangerous
SpaceX crashes: dangerous
FFmpreg would be even better.
𝕸𝖔𝖘𝖘Finally, something I can get behind.
Checks calendar
Well, shit.
I’m sure there’s no way this could go catastrophically wrong and that my SSDI income will be fine.
If it’s 8086 or Z80 I can help!
Excellente!! Soon my 64kbps mp3 file from FroatWire can be converted to 320 kbps with 96kbps quality!
Disgusting.
Lossy social security encoding.
I Cast FistEh, nobody will care about some bits being lost there, I’m sure
Wrong choice, I’d advice the use of COBOL-on-Wheelchair
circuitfarmerProbably the only good April Fool’s joke I saw anywhere this year. Stuff is bleak.