If you care about a person, even a little, talk to them once in a while.

Personal gripe time: I have severe RSD, I am autistic, I suffer from depression, and don't even get me started on being queer and trans.

It took me years and years and YEARS to heal from the assumption that people barely tolerate me. That I have to justify my existence, that any time I interact with a person it's a chore for them.

I still often believe that. And I am luckier than most. I am not saying that to be coy or to downplay things. I have people who tell me, again and again, that they care about me and they want me and they want me around.

And yet it's still exhausting that most friendships and semi-friendships I maintain require active effort. In most cases, people who do not generally MIND being around me, who like talking to me, who value me still need to be prodded into interaction.

If I talk to them, they respond. If I don't, they do not. Sometimes ever. Sometimes "only" for years or months.

Now, to a person like me this is emotional labour. I have to FORCE myself to believe that I am not doing violence to people just by existing around them.

And it eats me up inside that there have only ever been a handful of people who chat me up with some regularity, to let me know they think about me, to just have a short conversation and go about their days. Not to mention people who want to hang out or whatever.

It is possible you are reading this and are confused. Why is that a big deal? If I like people, why would I not want to talk to them?

I want to. I just sometimes can't. Look at the CW of this post again. Some people are built different.

If you have a person in your life that is autistic (or otherwise neurodivergent), who is queer, who is marginalised in some ways (especially in ways that can make interacting in person more difficult, like being disabled), who has a history of trauma, who has depression or RSD or any sort of mental issue that makes it difficult to initiate interaction...

...fucking TALK to them. It may seem like not a big deal to you, but that's precisely because it is less effort for you. You may think they know you like or love them, but even if they do, it takes effort to remember that.

Just go through your social contacts or your mental list of friends, and chat with a person today. You don't need a reason. Only neurotypicals require reasons /hj

No matter how much you may think such a little gesture helps, you are STILL underestimating its impact.

The few people who consistently poked and prodded at me and went "hey, how have you been?" have sometimes been a lifesaver. Occasionally I'm pretty sure I mean that literally.

I feel guilty because I didn't reciprocate for some of them. I was so exhausted by trying to maintain other friendships and not let them wither away, I neglected people who were more active because I just had no energy left. And yes, I know I perpetuated what I myself dislike.

Just, talk to a person. Ask to grab a coffee or beer, or to have a walk, or just talk to them on Discord or whatever. If it's easy for you, just do it.

Not every second of your life, not even regularly. But if you feel like it and you have the energy and five minutes to spare? Do it.

Yes, five minutes can be a lot to such a person.

Please Boost this if you're mentally healthy, neurotypical and doing OK. If you don't... please also Boost it, but I know some of y'all will, because y'all KNOW what I am talking about xD