The better replacement is baking soda. Mix a tablespoon in a glass of water, chug. It’s gross at first, but it will annihilate heartburn.

Be warned! The reaction’s byproducts are H2O and CO2, and the reaction doesn’t end in your stomach. Be prepared to expel gas out one end and water out the other.

You’ll notice the gas, but the water comes from the acid being neutralized and won’t really be detectable. You just drank a glass of water too, that’s way more water than a tablespoon of baking soda can produce.

The H2O comes from the reaction.

NaHCO₃ (baking soda) + HCl (hydrochloric acid) → NaCl (sodium chloride) + H₂O (water) + CO₂ (carbon dioxide)

Water is created. Now pass that through your entire digestive tract full of HCl. Now H20 pops up, uh, where it’s not normally in the pipeline. Does that make sense? You now have water where your guts weren’t prepared to process it?

In any case, I shit straight liquid if I have to do this trick.