You're a website that shows a list of chats and a calendar. What are you loading for 30 seconds every time I open?
@olafurw Must be that "big data" which was all the rage a while ago. At least it downloads something big.
@olafurw it has this built-in patience training feature, you see. It's all for your own good!
@olafurw Every programmer on the team has to contribute something to justify their continued employment. This is why the equivalent one-man project would load in 300ms. 😅
@olafurw the AI became sentient and is doing a bit of Bitcoin mining on the side

@olafurw - Not to mention that Post-Win7 ambiguity! Remember when MS told you detailed steps and you knew what the app / OS was doing?

Now it's all :

"Umm ...... Ya! I'm here! .... What was it you wanted? ..... oh yeah! I'm errrrr ....... ummmm ..... 'doing some things'."

@olafurw there are a lot of days in the calendar
@olafurw they gave a team member the job to refactor it and now it's also calculating some prime numbers while loading
@olafurw Something something SharePoint back end
@olafurw I used to work in a related team. It’s loading over a 100MBs of data related to all of your channels so it knows the latest status. They used to make 100s of distinct web service calls, which was even slower. I wouldn’t have done it this way, but it was before my time.