Mike GrayI have a confession to make.
Recently, I’ve been questioning whether I’ve lost some love for technology, engineering culture, and so on, and I’ve been struggling to reflect on why. Some of you may have noticed that, lately, I’ve been a bit absent.
Now you know why!
Well, I’m currently on my honeymoon and have found some headspace to reflect. It turns out I haven’t lost my love for technology, engineering culture, etc., at all.
In fact, I’ve started reading a book (which I was terrible at reviewing — sorry, @ahl!), Facilitating Software Architecture by Andrew Harmel-Law. The passion is very much still there; I am reading it and loving every word.
It is incredibly relatable, and I find myself nodding along — much to the annoyance of my now-wife, who gets frustrated when she’s trying to talk to me, and I don’t even hear her!
It’s within this that I’ve discovered what’s been draining me.
I haven’t lost my love of technology or software culture, but applying it in complex organisational systems that fundamentally approach things differently has been exhausting. These are systems where process and control are paramount.
There is a conflict here, and it is very much my job to balance this conflict and try to align engineering culture, architecture practices, etc., within this complex environment.
In smaller companies and previous economic climates, this balance is easier to achieve.
However, as companies grow and strive to become “well-oiled machines,” combined with the macroeconomic climate of squeezing every efficiency — measuring everything and accounting for every penny — this balance is becoming increasingly difficult to find.
Across the industry, more processes are being put in place to enhance efficiency, and there is mounting pressure on people like myself to do the same in functions such as architecture.
Centralised governance, ivory tower architecture — I am acutely aware of how ineffective these are. This shift in the tides is what has been draining me.
All of this is busywork, introducing waste into the system, providing only a false sense of control to make investors and others feel that their money is being spent as efficiently as possible.
The reality is that they are slowly strangling their organisations, reducing their capacity to enact sustainable change, and actually becoming more inefficient, even though the numbers on a spreadsheet may suggest otherwise.
I know this, and this is the business I’m in — and it is exhausting.
This is where I’ve been, and what’s been draining my energy.
Once I’m back from my honeymoon, this continues — the balancing of these two dichotomies, with the aim of finding a sensible equilibrium.
My passion still remains, and with a rest, I’m looking forward to continuing to find the balance between the two, with the promise to myself to find the time to reflect more often and frequently, something I used to be great at, but have been neglectful the last few months.