akia 
while I was typing that, cpu usage went up to 100% and then back down again, fun 
well, I did it, I upgraded my vps and now I have 4gb of ram and 3 cpu cores instead of two. It should be enough to handle what I have, with enough power to add more stuff without reaching the performance limit again
what the fuck why is it unresponsive again 
and of course I can't connect to it to see whats eating up so much resources until it goes back to normal
that should fix it...