BeverleyJun 22, 2024

@harriettmb @sinabhfuil the whole situation/outcome is astonishing...

To think, it's 2024... We're still in the dark ages.

I don't know whom to blame... upbringing, social media... there are several possibilities.

When I was growing up, awful things happened that weren't talked of, swept under the carpet (still impact me). My daughter has told me things from her time at school (2003 >) where boys blatantly misbehaved with no/few consequences.

Will it ever change? If so, what will it take?

Show threadPetrichor ᚄᚔᚅᚐᚁᚆᚃᚒᚔᚂJun 22, 2024
@TalktoBeverley @harriettmb You've put your finger on it. There are certain situations where judges give no real consequences: most of being a violent man, if you haven't been caught before; also being a dangerous driver
Show threadDave MathiesonJun 22, 2024
@sinabhfuil @TalktoBeverley @harriettmb It's the idea that a good work reference and impact on employment prospects are somehow weighed up against this level of violence that I find so depressing.
Show threadPetrichor ᚄᚔᚅᚐᚁᚆᚃᚒᚔᚂ
@d_mathieson @TalktoBeverley @harriettmb "Nice boy, really. Punched a random woman in the face multiple times? Pfft, could happen to a bishop."
Jun 22, 2024 at 6:19pmWeb
Show threadDave MathiesonJun 22, 2024
@sinabhfuil @TalktoBeverley @harriettmb What's so twisted about the "logic" of the sentence is that it seems to conflate extreme violence visited on another person with normal flawed behaviour that most people display from time to time (and maybe more so with younger people).
Show threadBeverleyJun 22, 2024

@d_mathieson @sinabhfuil @harriettmb

Exactly! And that alcohol can offer an excuse!

I grew up in a home where alcohol = domestic violence.

I can't help but despise those who indulge to the point of losing control.

Show threadPetrichor ᚄᚔᚅᚐᚁᚆᚃᚒᚔᚂJun 22, 2024
@TalktoBeverley @d_mathieson @harriettmb Or use alcohol as an excuse for them behaving like cunts - "The drink made me do it"
Show threadPetrichor ᚄᚔᚅᚐᚁᚆᚃᚒᚔᚂJun 22, 2024
@TalktoBeverley @d_mathieson @harriettmb Apparently it's the media's fault https://www.joe.ie/news/father-of-disgraced-soldier-cathal-crotty-blames-media-for-putting-him-here-806162 #CathalCrotty
Father of disgraced soldier Cathal Crotty blames media for 'putting him here'

The father of disgraced soldier Cathal Crotty says the attention surrounding his son's assault on Natasha O'Brien is caused by the media.

JOE.ie
Show threadKevin LydaJun 22, 2024
@sinabhfuil @TalktoBeverley @d_mathieson @harriettmb Mmmm... I have some other thoughts about who influenced his son to be a scumbag. Could someone please mail that man a mirror?
Show threadBeverleyJun 22, 2024

@sinabhfuil @d_mathieson @harriettmb

Good grief! No shame...

Where (and when I suppose) I come from, the lad would have been afraid for his parents to find out... and probably at least half the village would have been after him too.

There was a form of 'natural justice' in that village. This wouldn't have been tolerated. (Though male on male violence was a regular occurrence, which I in no way advocate!)

Show threadBeverleyJun 22, 2024

@sinabhfuil

Good grief!

Show threadJohn HurleyJun 22, 2024
@TalktoBeverley @d_mathieson @sinabhfuil @harriettmb regarding alcohol:
I've NEVER felt an urge to be violent/ aggressive after I've had a drink.
My personal belief is that those who blame drink are only using an excuse to let out a darker side of themselves.
Having said all that, I have a friend a guard. He says he has never been to a domestic situation where drink wasn't a factor
Show threadPetrichor ᚄᚔᚅᚐᚁᚆᚃᚒᚔᚂJun 22, 2024
@Johnhurley @TalktoBeverley @d_mathieson @harriettmb Or drugs
Show threadJohn HurleyJun 22, 2024
@sinabhfuil @TalktoBeverley @d_mathieson @harriettmb agreed
Show threadBeverleyJun 22, 2024

@Johnhurley @d_mathieson @sinabhfuil @harriettmb

Not everyone reacts the same way. I was merely relating my personal experience.

Fear and misery. Dreading the weekends because then he'd have more opportunity to drink...

Bad enough for my mother, but we children had no choice in the matter... Powerless.

Show threadJohn HurleyJun 22, 2024
@TalktoBeverley @d_mathieson @sinabhfuil @harriettmb that sounds brutal.
Hope you're OK
Show threadBeverleyJun 22, 2024

@Johnhurley @d_mathieson @sinabhfuil @harriettmb

Thank you John, for your good wishes. And it was.

I have to tell you tho', it never totally leaves you. It pushes you to make choices you otherwise wdn't have made, and affects your relationships down the line, which in turn impacts yr children.

I'm not meaning to whinge. Fortunately for me I had the drive to do well careerwise, but my personal relationships have been dreadful. Epiphanies came rather late to remedy finding 'love'.

Go well.