Good to know VGA and parallel port devices are safe.

Nah, they’ll just sue you if you’re using VGA instead of HDMI since it obviously means you are trying to crack DRM and thus running afoul of DMCA.

Everyone loves listening to their favorite purchased movie while watching a black screen

Nuh-uh, sound has to go over HDMI as well. You may only partake in your own culture through DRM-approved channels.

This got me thinking, could you still get an abortion in the bad parts of the US if you trademarked your DNA, and claimed that the condom breaking violated DMCA?

You know, show up at the doctors with a ton of papers headlined

CEASE AND DESIST

Or at least get child support out of Durex?

I think you’ve taken the long way around to becoming a sovereign citizen