sagLifehack
Flying SquidSure, I fantasize about doing this sort of shit with my kid sometimes too.
But you don’t do it.
Passerby6497What, are you saying that gaslighting your young child to do stuff they hate is harmful?
I can’t speak for other kids, but being honest with mine seems to work pretty well. “Why do I have to put away the dishes?” “Because if you don’t, we won’t be able to wash the dirty ones and then we’ll get roaches. Do you want roaches? No. So put away the dishes.”
But you would still be able to wash the dirty ones. This is just a lighter lie (which imo is totally fine).
Where would I put the dirty dishes so I could wash them if the sink is already full?
How about somewhere else for the moment?? LOL
You must have a large kitchen.
Not at all, but I’m also not stumped by having the sink full so much that I’m literally not capable of washing the dishes lmao. A kid might believe that since kids are fucking idiots but not an adult, surely
Then you must have a large sink or you must wash dishes every single time you eat rather than once a day. We don’t have time for that.
I love how this has got you absolutely stumped. You can pick stuff from the sink and put it out of the way. You can pile it on the goddamn floor if you need to. Whether your kid puts the dishes away or not is actually what allows you to wash the dishes. You could also move them. But you say the kid needs to do that so you can wash the dishes (even though you could wash them without it). It just makes it more convenient. See what I mean?
It’s “got me absolutely stumped” because we have a small kitchen and a small sink. There’s no room. We could put them on the floor, but we have dogs. Conceivably we could do something like put all the dishes on a shelf in the living room and come and get them one by one to clean them. Maybe you think that would teach my daughter something, but other than ‘my parents are doing something silly when we could just use the dishwasher,’ I don’t know what it would be.
Could it be that you don’t know my situation because you’ve never been to my home?
I have a small kitchen and a small sink. I somehow still understand the concept of piling them on some other surface for a moment so I can wash other dishes in the sink. I’m genuinely amazed by how a supposedly functioning adult seems to genuinely think their actual ability to wash the dishes hinges on whether their kid puts them away or not. Imagine if the kid didn’t do that, would you really, actually, just not be able to in any way wash the dishes? I just can’t believe that.
You’re telling your kid to put the dishes away because it makes things easier and convenient. It’s not an actual requirement for your ability to wash dishes, but I wouldn’t bother explaining that to a kid either. I’d just say put the dishes away so we can wash them. It’s not the whole truth but it’s a kid so I wouldn’t care either. This is unless you genuinely think your ability to wash the dishes hinges on your kid putting them away. In which case, wow.
Where, specifically, would this other surface be since you know my kitchen so well?
I can’t believe an adult just can’t wrap their head around this, bless your heart.
Maybe this will help: You tell your kid to put the dishes away, claiming so you can wash the dishes. But it’s not true in that you could wash the dishes without them having been put away. It just wouldn’t be as convenient. You could pile the dishes somewhere else, hell outside on the ground (lol) to make room in the sink and whatever while you clean other dishes. But it’d be inconvenient and stupid. You could wash the dishes on the kitchen table, but that’d also be inconvenient and stupid. You could do a lot of things but they wouldn’t be as convenient (and could be really stupid). So it’s not really that the dishes need to be put away so you can wash your dishes, it’s just it is much more convenient to do so. So what you are saying to the kid isn’t true in that sense.
Does that finally explain it?
So what you’re saying is, I should tell my daughter, “if you don’t put the dishes away, I will be forced to take them all outside and bring them in one by one and wash them.” Because that’s a sane thing to tell a child, rather than explain to them the concept of keeping things clean to keep the roaches away.
Got it.
Is that what you tell your kids?
I didn’t say at all what you should say, I was just noting that what you’re saying isn’t exactly the truth. It wasn’t a value judgement or even advice.
“if you don’t put the dishes away, I will be forced to take them all outside and bring them in one by one and wash them.”
If you want help workshopping this you could say that it’s just more convenient to put them away. That’d be true without being very convoluted, if being 100% honest was the goal. Whether it should be or not, imo not.
Most children, I would wager, are not so stupid that when you say something like I said, they will think, “well he must mean that there is literally no other possible option and therefore he is being 100% honest with me.” I know my daughter isn’t. She understands nuance and she understands that means that in our house, we clean dishes with the dishwasher.
Again, what do you tell your kids? I’m starting to suspect you don’t have any, which is what prompted this conversation.
If they understand that then it seems like you could say that it’s just more convenient and it’d be the same, but also 100% truthful. Assuming that’s the goal.
Again, what do you tell your kids?
That it’s more convenient
Yes, again, my child is smart enough to understand nuance. She doesn’t have to have everything put to her 100% literally. I’m not sure why your children do.
Also, I hope you’re not the one who is responsible for telling your children the difference between things like “honest” and “100% literally true” or they are fucked.
Yes, again, my child is smart enough to understand nuance. She doesn’t have to have everything put to her 100% literally. I’m not sure why your children do.
Sounds like your daughter might have you beat there since I didn’t say she doesn’t, I didn’t say she does, I didn’t say they do.
Also, I hope you’re not the one who is responsible for telling your children the difference between things like “honest” and “100% literally true” or they are fucked.
That’s very sweet of you.
You said I wasn’t being honest with her by not telling her the 100% literal truth. So yeah, you’re saying she doesn’t understand nuance.
I said it’s a lighter lie in that it’s not actually (literally) true.
Got it, so if you ask me to do something important for you and I tell you I’m too busy, but when in actual fact, I could quit my job, sell my belongings, move to your city and do it, it’s a lie. Right?
It’s not a lie if you actually are too busy at the moment.
I wouldn’t be too busy at the moment if I quit my job if my job was what made me busy. So it’s a lie, right?
You wouldn’t be too busy after quitting your job so whether or not it’s a lie depends on if you had quit your job before answering. If you had quit it and didn’t have anything to do at that moment then yeah it’d be a lie. If you still had your job when you answered then you wouldn’t be lying.
Wow. Everyone must be lying to you constantly. I can picture you at a restaurant after a waiter lists the specials. “Those are made of conventional ingredients I could buy at a grocery store and cook myself, so they aren’t really special now are they? You’re lying to me!”
Everyone must be lying to you constantly.
Not really, afaik
I can picture you at a restaurant after a waiter lists the specials. “Those are made of conventional ingredients I could buy at a grocery store and cook myself, so they aren’t really special now are they? You’re lying to me!”
I thought the list specials meant it was something outside of the ordinary menu, making them special to the list. If they claim they’re made of special ingredients and it’s the same ingredients from the regular store you visit, then they probably are taking you for a ride tbh.
“They’re from outside the ordinary menu, but you could make them if you wanted to and I paid you enough. So they aren’t special, you liars! Also, you call this the soup of the day, but you offer three soups so they are all the soups of the day! I am taking my business to an honest establishment! Good day, sir!”
They’re from outside the ordinary menu
That makes them special to the menu though. Not sure what your issue with that is tbh.
“Nowhere do you state that “specials” mean something other than what is on the ordinary menu! You did not make that clear to me at all, you liar!”
By the way, how many children do you have? Remember, if it’s zero, you wouldn’t want to lie like you did earlier when I asked you what you told them and you responded.
If they don’t specify how they’re special then they need to be special in any way for what they say to be true though. If they say they’re special in a certain way and they aren’t, then that’d be a lie.
By the way, how many children do you have?
Remember, if it’s zero, you wouldn’t want to lie like you did earlier when I asked you what you told them and you responded.
Not sure why you think I wouldn’t want to lie or why you think I lied earlier.
Got it. Lying by omission is not lying. You need to contact the world’s justice systems and let them know.
Not sure why you think I wouldn’t want to lie
Okay, then what is even the point of this conversation? Are you just bored and looking for someone to be contentious with?
Lying by omission
Lying by omission, otherwise known as exclusionary detailing, is lying by either omitting certain facts or by failing to correct a misconception. In the case of the former, an example of this would be a car salesman claiming a car to have amazing fuel economy while neglecting to mention that it has no engine and is completely immobile. In the case of the latter, it could be a situation in which a misconception exists that the claimant is aware of but fails to correct, such as a person who wanders around a hospital dressed as a doctor, offering treatment while failing to mention that she is in fact just getting a kick out of pretending to be a doctor.
Got it. Lying by omission is not lying. You need to contact the world’s justice systems and let them know.
I’m not sure what omission you are talking about.
Okay, then what is even the point of this conversation? Are you just bored and looking for someone to be contentious with?
I just wanted to make the original point. And now I’m just replying to your messages (even though the original discussion seem to be over) because I feel like it’d be rude not to.