SolidGrueWhat's a bit of good advice that's really bad advice?
Just be yourself.
There is a reason people hide who they really are until you get to know them.
henfredemarsBe yourself! Eww, not like that!
“Bring your authentic self to work”
Was pretty prevalent in tech for a while. Fuck no I’m not doing that.
BoozillaThis is sadly very true. Keep most of your coworkers, especially bosses, on a low information diet. It’s like dealing with the police. Some of them will try to use anything you say against you in the court of HR.
This is not to say you can’t make any friends at work. Just be very careful in who you pick. Make sure the person is trustworthy (and you know as much about them as they know about you).
Hell yeah. I only told my boss about my adhd diagnosis in case I need to use that as leverage some day. Otherwise I’m basically a mystery.
YaksDCI have worked in the same office for 22 years, no one knows my birthday, what my hobbies are or where I live other than “downtown”. There is work me and then the real me and never the twain shall meet.
You sound like me. Do you want to not hang out sometime?
Absolutely! ☺
Sign me up for the not hanging out club!
I won’t hang out either.
You guys mind if I don’t tag along?
Can I join too?
I will say I’ll be there, but I’m also going to cancel.
berkeleyblueFair. I do that with most coworkers. I have one maybe two I consider friends and we do stuff outside if work. Those are the people that know me. Everyone else knows the work version of me.
Rosa from Brooklyn 99?
Ha! I love it!
“A George divided against itself cannot stand”
Seinfeld - Independent George (1/2)
snooggumsIf you don’t succeed, try and try again.
It leaves out the steps where you figure out why you think you failed the first time so trying again with a different approach has a chance of success instead of just failing over and over again.
jeffwThere’s also a good quote about repeating the same thing over and over again being the definition of insanity. Some platitudes are useful
Edit: repeating the same thing and expecting a different outcome. Attributed to Einstein, but who knows
I wake up to my alarm every morning, guess I must be insane.
You expect a different outcome every morning?
I definitely do. This time I will be well rested.
Maybe I should change something…
No. This time will just be different.
Hoping to feel rested, and clearly I don’t since I didn’t include all the words!
You been checked for sleep apnea?
I have sleep apnea and a breathing machine, which helps, but doesn’t solve the issue that trying to adjust my sleep schedule to the normal 8-5 routine on a daily basis results in poor sleep outcomes for me.
My problem is that falling asleep earlier results in poor sleep, if I can even fall asleep.
Think of it as the reverse of someone who always rises early and can’t sleep in or gets terrible sleep when they stay up too late.
I am empathic to your situation. Good luck getting into your rhythm!
The only solution is to get a job that isn’t 8-5, but finding one that pays the 8-5 rate is really difficult.
This is actually a major reason I’m glad to work in software. The culture in the industry usually tends not to care about specific working hours as much, as long as you’re around consistently and do good work.
That doesn’t mean to do it the exact same way over and over again.
Thats what it literally says, so if you don’t know the context…
Sometimes it is used for changing habits through repetition of the exact same steps when it isn’t possible. Like someone who has trouble falling asleep being told that going to bed the same time every night will just work to fix sleep issues when that doesn’t work for everyone.
As an autistic person who struggles with reading things too literal even I know it just means to not give up. It doesn’t mean to do it the exact same way and expect a difference. People who are reading that way are just being obtuse.
I have no idea how you’d take it so literally, you are just being uncharitable with its meaning. It could mean , oh you struggle sleeping. Have you tried melatonin, have you gone to the doctor, do you shut everything off before bed. Try that, don’t give up! You have to be looking to twist that saying to see it that way.
As someone who has trouble sleeping, I have literally been told by dozens of people that changing a sleep schedule is as simple as setting an alarm to wake up each moring and going to bed at the same time. They have even used this specific saying.
I am not saying that is what I think it means. I am saying that is how a lot of people use and understand it, which is why it is bad advice.
Also, yes I have tried all of those things and they don’t work for me. My body wants to wake up midmorning and decades of trying different approaches hasn’t worked. I am tired all the time except when I take a vacation and get up when I want, which is about 9 a.m. That is also the only time I ever feel rested.
I mean I sometimes take sleeping pills to get some sleep, I’m not arguing about the frustrations of things not working. You having a sleeping disorder or some other issue.
that line is more about. If you fall get back up. If your first painting sucks, that’s okay your next one will be a little bit better.
Some idiots may use it the way but it’s not how it should be used. Though I understand it would be irritating to hear for something like that.
Having a non-sterotypical sleeping pattern is not a disorder, that is insulting and a perpetuation of people who naturally rise earlier being seen as better than those with different sleep patterns.
If a lot of people are using it wrong because they take it literally, then it is bad advice. Better advice would be “If you don’t succeed, consider another approach”.
I said or something else though if you want to be argumentative, insomnia is in-fact a disorder you dork. Why are we talking about sleep for fucks sake. It was used as a broad example and now we are suddenly on this topic? I now see why you take the quote so literally.
This isn’t insomnia, it is just having a natural variance in sleep cycles.
I don’t take the quote literally, which you would understand if you could read.
Kettle meet black. My god.
SorteKaninI’d say most of single-sentence advice falls under “dubious” advice, as it really lacks any kind of nuance. It can be a guideline and perhaps words to live by, but it will rarely help in concrete situations where more specific context should be considered.
My mum always used to say “Everything works out in the end” or something else equally trite until the day I snapped “Yeah thats why theres a suicide help line, because everything always works out in the end for everybody.”
They are supposed to be single sentence reminders of complex and nuanced advice, but along the way people forget to pass along the nuance.
🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 🏆“What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”
No it doesn’t. In most cases, you’re now weaker.
Right?! What doesn’t kill you may almost kill you.
UsernameblankfaceYeah, people forget that it’s a very specific type of experience for a specific type of person where this saying actually works. Like overcoming a fear by facing it head-on is great for some people and a source of further trauma for others.
It does make you wiser. You may learn how to better deal with your emotions or feelings. Or how to avoid the situation in the future.
Nah, usually just more trauma after a certain point, if its anywhere near even the hyperbolic description of "Kill."
I've been through enough. A mild to moderate amount of life challenges will be plenty going forward.
Yeah, it's really best to learn by observation than direct pain lol, but some of us are too stubborn for that.
A_Random_IdiotYeah, Where can I hit the buzzer to denote I’m done.
I’ve been through enough already, cut it the fuck out. I dont need more. If it made me stronger I’d already beat the hulk in fucking arm wrestling at this point.
What doesnt kill you now may still be a contributing factor later down the road.
What doesn’t kill you mutates and tries again.
Yeah, that saying is so dumb. Like people never heard about polio or these days long COVID.
“always split on 18”? What is that supposed to mean?
Also please delete the second one, we need to trick people into having kids to keep the line going up.
VanthPlaying blackjack, when you have a pair and split. You don’t actually often split on a pair of 9s.
Thank you for explaining!
I had a buddy who was a blackjack dealer. He explained it to newb players like this: “dude, you can do that, but if you had an 18” dick, would you cut it in half?"
Now, knowing /badwomensanatomy, that’s passe’, but it stuck with a younger me.
So it’s kinda like “quit while you’re still ahead” type of deal? I don’t think any type of gambling parabolas can be good advice considering, well, the nature of gambling.
No, it’s not something that is meant to be broader advice or a metaphor for something else, it’s literally advice for playing blackjack. What they’re saying is that it isn’t actually a good idea to split on an 18 when playing.
I have kids and definitely like them most of them time.
Well kid #2 is an asshole but he’s the smart one so I’ll be nice in the event he becomes a doctor.
Split is a move in blackjack. It’s not just hit and stay.
You turn your 9-9 into two separate hands starting with 9s. The most likely card in blackjack is a ten cuz of all the face cards, so the idea is you get 19s instead of 18s
However according to blackjack cheat sheets you should not do this if the dealer is showing 7 10 or A.
cobysevwe need to trick people into having kids to keep the line going up.
I really hope you’re being sarcastic about this. It’s so hard to tell on the Internet.
Thanks for asking about split on 18! I assumed it was about not trying to marry your highschool sweetheart or something!