I feel like there’s more to this story. My experience is US centric, but it’s considered very rude to stare at people… and I can’t imagine why anyone would tell you “maybe the issue is you” when you complained about folks staring at you.

I will say that a large number of guys don’t realize how obvious they are when checking out someone they’re attracted to.

I can’t imagine why anyone would tell you “maybe the issue is you” when you complained

It’s very common for people to tell you that you are the issue when you complain. They do this because then it requires no effort on their part to change their behavior. They just volley the ball back into your court and tell you, “Uh, did you ever think that the issue is with you?” and “Don’t expect society to bend over backwards to adjust to your little issues” Once they say that they are guilt free they can continue on behaving as they choose because in their mind the issue is with you and not them.

Have you not experienced this? It’s very common now.

I feel like there’s more to this story.

Sorry, there’s not more to the story. People stare for uncomfortable amounts of time. Also, you stating that “there’s more to the story” is you doing a form of what I described above…which is pushing back on the person complaining and not on the underlying rude behavior.

It’s very common for people to tell you that you are the issue when you complain.

In person?? Holy shit …that is, like, ultra mega hyper turbo rude. (Online it is common, even expected). US? If so what state do you live in because I can’t imagine that ever happening here in Colorado. The state is generally pretty friendly and chill compared to some places I’ve been.

Yeah, people are not considerate nowadays. I can give you two examples:

This was in Tennessee (I do not live there now). I had a neighbor install a dog in his backyard. I say “install” because he got a dog, threw it in the backyard, never took it for walks, and spent no time with it. The dog would just bark and bark. When I complained he told me “you are just sensitive to loud noises”. Meanwhile, there were several nights when the dog would bark and wake us both up and I could hear him angrily yell at the dog to be quiet.

This was actually in Colorado. I was just passing through and camping in a National Forest. It was very peaceful until a dude came in and started blasting his car stereo while he was setting up his tent. I wasn’t even near him and was several sites away. I walked over and asked him if he could turn it down and it was instant asshole time. He started telling me about how all his friends were coming and it was going to get loud. And how it was my fault for coming to a popular camping spot and expecting silence.

So, you can’t reason with people. If someone is being rude they are the exact type who are not going to self-correct their rude behavior when pointed out. In fact, they will most likely double down on it and then insinuate that is you that’s the actual problem.