I love dogs. I had one as a teen and never had one since. I called him Coffee because it was an easy unusual name that was unique. Not many people drank coffee in our family back then.

But I never in my life could ever understand people who ‘kissed’ their pet. I have a friend with a tiny dog and she loves picking it up, kissing it and letting the dog lick her lips.

I always just keep imagining that this is the same pet that licks its butt and the butts of other dogs when they get together, or doesn’t mind digging into the garbage, licking rotting food or taste testing random feces it found.