/c/café daily chat thread for 28 September 2023

https://monyet.cc/post/931576

/c/café daily chat thread for 28 September 2023 - monyet.cc

Have you guys ever feel pressured to spend time with your friends? I need to dedicate time to my personal projects, so that doesn’t leave me with a lot of time for games and fun. I recently returned to Valorant, and while I don’t have time for aim training, I am totally fine with that(I used to play the game quite seriously).

But things are different when I have to spend time with some of my friends. They basically don’t have any other hobby, so they only do one kind of activity in their free time. They also don’t have a specific someone who can always spend that time with them too, so I ended up being ‘that person’. I also got slightly tilted when I heard the line ‘I don’t like to wait’ from one of these friends when she was complaining another friend of mine doesn’t respond to messages and isn’t active(but another friend and I are kinda okay and we usually just played until he comes?) , and that makes her look selfish because everyone has their own activities, right?

I understand that my friends are stressed from work and they feel lonely, but it’s not like I don’t experience the same thing… If anything, I have been fighting off my negative thoughts for more than half a year, and it took me that long to finally find a way to flip my mindset whenever it goes bad(and that still doesn’t solve all of my problems). Drawing boundaries is one way to solve the problem, but I have lost friends in the past before precisely because I didn’t spend enough time(sometimes almost the whole day except my classes) with them, and I don’t want the same thing to happen again.

Have the same problem, except i’m the one that tend to drift away from everyone(like a hermit, but crab, hermit crab? 🦀), and have to force myself to spend time with others to prevent that(or to delay the inevitable 💀). Have been drifted away from secondary school friend and college friend before, both due to distance and difference in socmed platform, i think it’s happening again and i can’t stop it 💀

*pat

I drifted away from most friends from school since they aren’t the type who are active on socmed(or they all have their own group chats in Whatsapp or somewhere, because I wasn’t the most liked person in school), but fortunately I’m still good with my uni mates and some online friends circles. I did get kicked out of one circle for being too inactive, but I don’t play the same games with them anymore and don’t share common interests with them(other than the game we used to play) so it was hard to catch up.

I think friends that stay the longest are those who you can just share anything with, even the lamest shit ever and they won’t care that much.

Yeah, same, for me it’s kinda i don’t have the time and the timing usually not allow me to have outing, and the distance didn’t help too. Kinda miss the time i could hangout with a bunch of friend doing absolutely nothing in car till midnight, just lying there lol.
aw yeah distance is always a problem :( I got a wfh job opportunity, but I wouldn’t move home because all my friends are in kl/selangor ;_;
Better stay close with friend!