SeahorseTrebleWhat is the best way to respond to "You have an answer for everything", "You always have to be right", or "You always need to have the last word"?
Start with first principles - who is saying this, and are they correct?
Well it’s correct that I (almost) always have an answer for everything they’re saying, am I supposed to feel bad about that? I don’t feel like it’s a valid criticism, but ironically I don’t know how best to respond to that because it just doesn’t make sense to me.
I don’t think it’s correct to say that I “have” to be right, I’m open to being wrong, in this case I’m usually not; again, why am I being blamed for something that doesn’t seem like a fault?
Having the last word is the most nonsensical one to me, since it’s often unclear when anyone’s word would end up being the last word or not depending on if another word is spoken afterward, and by them saying that technically their word is after mine, and I could just as easily say that any “word” they said was trying to be the last one. What if a word is just a word?
JustEnoughDucksI don’t think it’s correct to say that I “have” to be right, I’m open to being wrong, in this case I’m usually not
Having the last word is the most nonsensical one to me, since it’s often unclear when anyone’s word would end up being the last word or not depending on if another word is spoken afterward
There is a very apt series of shorts for your behaviour:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=mdyHX8K1yfY& www.youtube.com/watch?v=mxSa-C92Wno&
It is ok to know someone isn’t 100% correct and not call them out for it. It is a huge social skill not yo be right all of the time, but to validate other peoples’ feelings and pursuit of learning new things. In short, just be quiet and don’t say anything like 75% of the time if you know someone is wrong.
Average Redditor goes to therapy
Lol that’s hilarious, thanks for this. Very funny skits that capture a particular kind of Redditor (maybe the average as the name implies?). I don’t feel like this really accurately represents my situation though, since this guy is just douchey and pretentious/arrogant about everything, and nitpicks and corrects people over every small and trivial detail.
At least from my point of view, I’m not the one that starts arguments or argues over things unless it’s particularly important, and even then I try to let it go unless I’m being actively confronted by it.
It probably makes a difference to know that only one person has ever said these things to me. I’ve just looked into the phenomenon happening with other people as well (on Reddit 😆), and often it is just a single person who does it. So it seems like either this one person is unreasonable, or the problem manifests only with them somehow.
I guess working from the position that I have reason to believe I’m in the right (not in the sense of “trying” to be right all the time, but about being genuinely stuck in a position where no matter what I do, I’ll be accused of things anyway).
If conversations with this one person are frequently reaching the point where things like that are being said, it seems pretty clear cut: you should honestly just avoid any of the topics that have resulted in debates with this person.
It doesn’t necessarily mean you can’t talk to them about other things or that you can’t be friends (although it might).
Not every relationship has to allow for talking about all topics.
Sometimes being right isn’t actually important and can actually be counterproductive with certain people/topics.