Awake
A pretty good night's sleep, probably 9.5 hours of time asleep. The wakeup was kind of wrenching and I was highly tempted to shut the alarm and go back to sleep.
But Ginza. I can take a nap later if I need more sleep.
Plan to buy melatonin when I run errands today and use that this evening to try to help me get 2 good nights' sleep in a row.
Working on decaf tea and a banana to try to get brain engine sputtering to life
Brain is well smashed potatoes cold in fridge
Ginza has arrived outside, 625 AM. She's now sitting near the flowerpot by sidewalk, looking up at my apartment windows.
After I finish this cup of tea, I will brush my hair, grab the bag of treats, go outside and start the daily sit and chat with Ginza.
Today was the longest sit and chat with Ginza yet. Lots happened.
Ginza of course got breakfast and treats, pets and cuddles. She also took a 10 minute nap in her cat bed.
Two big things from today. First is that we went for 75 minutes, doing some things together, at times just chilling together. Ginza explored the apartment a lot today. She was in my bedroom 3 or 4 times, she went in the bathroom at least once. She followed me into the kitchen a couple of times.
Based on what I tooted above, it seems to me that Ginza is claiming or has claimed my apartment as part of her territory. She's become very comfortable at coming when I call to her and she often follows me around if I amble about in the apartment.
I feel very happy.
Now I'm finishing off a cup of decaf tea, then will shower and get myself scrubbed and clean smelling
I hope to run errands after that. Feels like I have enough spoons and it would be good to get those done early. Plus obviously now I need to get a litter box for Ginza and see if we can show that to her in the apartment and show her she will have a place to relieve herself in it.
Then we'll have established 3 important things. She can eat, sleep, and relieve herself in the apartment.
That was a really good shower. I cleaned myself top to bottom and shaved away leg hair.
Caffeine withdrawal symptoms have greatly reduced the last 2 days. I feel like maybe I'm close to baseline self now.
The better sleep last night has helped a lot too. Now I just need to let my hair dry, make an errands list, and then run the errands, get them out of the way.
If I feel good enough, I might swim this afternoon. Forecast shows this as last day to reach high 80s before pool closes.
One other detail from this morning with Ginza is that I told her, "I love you."
I said that out loud both to her, and myself really.
I ran errands. Got everything on the list though that involved me realizing I had forgotten one item and going back into store again after dropping items off in car.
I'm doing surprisingly well? It's been a busy morning. But maybe with caffeine withdrawal largely over, things are normalizing.
It is going to be hot today. For that reason now I'm going to take it easy and hopefully around 2 PM I will go take what might be my last swim in the pool this summer.
Loaded Magic Washing Box and it's now doing its happy noises of gurgling and swishing.
Watered flowers and veggies. Took out garbage.
Now that I'm feeling better and more baseline, I'm glad I quit caffeine. It made for rough days this week but I'll do better without having to feed an addiction like caffeine.
This morning with Ginza made me feel much like I had felt when Binker Bonkers was still alive. He too would often follow me around although in his last couple of years he tended to rest and sleep a lot. But he too would come if I called him.
Now Ginza does that too and a few times today she shadowed me around the apartment.
My apartment finally felt full almost again. I may not be a good human partner for people, but I've come to love cats and learn about them so much.
It's tempting but I don't think I should swim today. Now that I've settled down from the busy morning, I can feel a sense that swimming might be more spoons than I have left now.
I need to keep in mind I didn't sleep well this week and I'm still in bad deficit from that. Better to just take it easy the rest of the way.
I've snacked on chips and salsa to get calories in me. I haven't eaten nearly enough this week and need to make up for that now that my stomach has settled down after jiggling about due to caffeine withdrawal.
Also starting to feel real sleepy but hope to hold on until later this evening to go to sleep. Tonight I will do so with a low dose of melatonin and hope that helps me sleep solidly or if I do wakeup any, I go back to sleep quickly.
I mentioned Seabiscuit (2003) as one of my favorite feelgood movies.
What all do you have as favorite feelgood movies?
I feel it's important sometimes to feed yourself feelgood stories because they can help remind us of what we feel is virtuous and important in how we behave in the world.
I'm curious to hear what others might think.
The scenes around the death of Charles Howard's son are really well done. Especially the scene of Howard holding his son's body, visibly sobbing, but we don't hear the sound of that. Followed by a shot of a funeral, again no sound.
Those scenes can remind us of times when we've felt grief but don't know how to express it or if it should be heard any.
Then the scene that follows of Howard playing with a toy of his lost son, and when he cries, it's easy for a viewer to sob along with him.
The scene where Charles Howard talks to Tom Smith is gorgeous. Smith is sitting at his campfire, the racehorse who Smith rescued from being shot after its foot was broken, is nearby.
After initial greetings and sitting down, Howard asks about the horse to Smith, "Will he get better?"
"Already is."
Howard asks, "Will he race?"
Smith says, "No, not that one."
Howard asks, "So why are you fixing him."
Smith, "Because I can!" He then pauses and says, "Every horse is good for something...
"He could be a lead horse or a cart pony, he's still nice to look at. You know, you don't throw a whole life away just because he's banged up a little."
And nothing more needs to be said or shown. We just next see that Howard has hired Smith to the trainer for Howard's horses.
I love how you two are bonding!!
Iza Running Again
Matt
Madame Aronow